Went for my workout this morning. I did not bring my coke because Nicole was going to be there. Big mistake! I was dying for a line! My workout was tough because it has been awhile. After the workout Justin headed for the shower and I told him I was going out for a cigarette and I will take a quick ...

Getting a lot done today. Washed the floor and dusted the whole house and some laundry. I have done 7 lines so far, just did one while I take a break. I have been teasing Justin a lot as we text back and forth. I keep telling him I’m taking a break to have a cigarette and do a line. He doesn’t say a...

He also asked me about a timetable of when I would stop having sex with Justin because he said soon I want us to be a couple without anyone else involved sexually. I said after the baby we will work out arrangements and it won’t include sleeping with him. I told him not to worry. That from now on he...

I’m counting my lines today. I want to catch up to Mike, so when he does a line, I am doing one too. I just did my 4th one, but 3 are the regular ones. As much as I love the meth lines, have to be careful with those. I couldn’t resist this morning though:). It makes it easy to zip through cleaning. ...

One thing about Mike, he is a boob guy. He can’t leave my boobs alone, but sometimes they are too sensitive. I am now a EE cup. I love how they look under a bra but topless they are a bit saggy because they are so heavy. Mike said if they need some help after the baby he would take care of it for me...

Wow Mike came home with a nice surprise. The meth coke was incredible. I text Justin and told him I couldn’t make my workout this morning. Told him I had morning sickness. Really I did a line of the meth coke and I’m not going anywhere right now. He actually said to me does the coke help make that f...

Ok the truth. I couldn’t stay away from Mike. After We finished appointments at Mayo, And we came back I have been having an affair with Mike. Probably about 2 months ago. I would make excuses to go out when I was going to his house. Yes, I started doing coke with him. We have fallen deeply in love,...

I text Justin and told him from now on just think of me as his personal whore. I will wear anything he wants me to wear, and do sexually anything he wants. I will also let him know Often he is having an affair with his wife, who is now deeply in love and living with another man. I am going to make h...

I’ll admit right now I am loving the power I have and will use it to get more. When I was 15 I moved in with a coke dealer that was 19, might have been 20. He got me hooked and I loved it but he also held it back from me for sex. He had complete control over me. I remember he used to ration or take ...

Mike text me and said he was going to be home an hour or two late. He said he had to pick up more coke, and he had a surprise for me, but he thought about it and wanted to make sure I liked it first. He said usually he gets uncut, but sometimes he loves having some of it cut with meth. He wanted to ...

I love the power I have over Justin now. I text him to make sure he knows that I’m with Mike from now on and as you can see I absolutely love coke and so does Mike. I am his now, and I’m doing this so we can have an erotic affair. I want to make sure you understand that. I love having an affair with...

I’m back home. I feel so powerful now over Justin. I love the feeling. Coke is confidence and I feel I have full control now. It makes me want even more. I went right out to the pool and sat down and told him I need a line so bad right now because I don’t drive for an hour after I have one. I took o...

I think what a lot of people don’t understand about me and Mike is it doesn’t matter if we are addicted to coke or not. We would use it the same way. I use it like any other medicine. It makes me feel better all the time. The nice part about getting hooked on it is it tells you when you need it. I w...

Today was the first day I woke up needing a line. I love that feeling knowing how good it feels to satisfy it. Same with my cigarettes, I am craving them now too. It’s such an awesome way to start your day!!! Mike and I are getting very close which we were before I left the first time, but this time...

Celebrating our relationship with lines and love making. This is my new home. Mike said to me when he got home and went to get a line he said someone was feeling good today! I said yeah I did quite a bit today. He told me he was teasing, do whatever you need. I’m loving it!

Just did another line. I can’t stop smiling that I’m doing lines again. My plan is working perfectly, I will live with Mike from now on and have sex with Justin a few times a week. He is already becoming dependent on me to fulfill his need to have an affair with me. It is pretty hot and erotic, I lo...

I am too high. I sent Justin a long e-mail why I need coke like other people use prescriptions to get by, all with potential side effects. I know you figured out since I’m with Mike I’m doing coke again. Well I am doing coke again, and smoking cigarettes. They get me through life, I need them! I sen...

Justin just text me and thanked me for starting our affair. He said it was the hottest sex he ever had. He asks me if I was coming over tomorrow and I said yes. I love you so much! I’m going to be living with Mike permanently now as we discussed. We get along great, and I am doing this for you becau...

Wow I am home. I just did a line. I didn’t just want it I needed it. Glad to have that feeling back. So I came out of the house onto the pool deck. Justin told me I looked so hot. So did he actually and I was dying to fuck him after doing a line. I basically said ok, as of in a few minutes we start ...

OMG! I am on my way home. A lot to talk about! I’m craving a line for the first time:). I love the feeling of satisfying it. I’m hooked again! Or maybe just excited!

Wow what a make out session we just had. I’m in the bathroom just did a line. Freshening up my lips. I told him to wait by the pool so we could talk a few minutes. I’m nervous because I’m going to have a cigarette as soon as I go out there. I’m feeling good about it because I just did a line.

I’m on my way. I look just like a hooker, he is going to melt inside of me:). Can’t wait to see how he reacts when I light up my cigarette. He will be helpless:).

I told Justin since he was so good about having an affair this time I am coming over at 11. Told him to ask Nicole to disappear til 1. I am so dying to put him to the test. First thing I do is a line then take him out to the pool and have a cigarette and let him know I smoke and will never quit! Thi...

I just did my third line. It is so empowering. Justin has text me twice and told me he accepts that I’m living another life now for us to have an affair, and what I do to make my relationship strong is up to me, and he won’t interfere. He said he learned his lesson and admits he ruined it the last t...

I also told him if he pushes me, or lectures me on anything at all the affair will end on the spot! I said you understand that right? I’m not yours anymore, we are a true affair. If you want a long term affair with your wife, as much as I do, we have to be just an affair, anything I do is up to me. ...

I’m so high right now. I have been text teasing Justin. I told him this time I am making sure our fantasies are very real. I hope you know that I really am going to live here, and this is a real affair between us. How bad do you want me moving in with him? He said really bad! You know how much I wan...

Mike is so sweet and thoughtful. He left for work and there was a line on the table in the kitchen with my cigarettes and coffee. It said I wanted to make sure your day got off to a good start. I love you. I did the line and had my first real craving for a cigarette, and the feeling of satisfying th...

Just did my last line of the night. I will start my affair with Justin tomorrow and I will make sure I tease him and make him love it! Then I can pack up, go home and do lines all day:).

Nicole just got home from her Mom’s and text me. She said wow, do you know how excited you got Justin? All he can talk about is having an affair with you!!!! You guys sure know how to turn each other on I will say that!!! Omg, that is so perfect. That solidifies I am Mike’s now!!! Finally going to g...

Full line 3:), so nice! You get in a lot of conversation doing lines. Mike asked me so if you have a daughter like you were, and she wanted to smoke when she was 12 would you let her. I said of course. I know what it felt like wanting to smoke, and have them taken away from me. All it did was make m...

Just did another full line. I’m becoming myself again and I love it so much! Mike is great! We are going to live together full time now. No more worries about my coke, he is amazing. We have done so much talking, and we are so much alike. I won’t be spending the time Mike is at work with Justin. I n...

I just did my first full line in 5 months:). Wow I am so glad to be back to myself. I love Mike so much. He is so perfect for me! I may have to reconsider. I am going to take a few lines for tomorrow when I am home. I’m already feeling hooked on my cigarettes or maybe it is the coke. I’m going to ha...

The sneaky part of my plan is perfect. I’m going to make sure the affair I have with Justin will be so explosive that he is totally needing it. I will also make sure he knows how deeply in love I am with Mike and I am all his. Once he realizes we are permanently having an affair and he has no contro...

I wanted to add something important here. I know Justin adores me. I also adore him. I realize that I’m at my best because I have lived my life like this when I am doing coke and smoking. I function better, and feel way better. The only thing missing from my relationship with Justin is I can’t be th...

My honey is so sweet. He had my half line waiting for me when I came out into the kitchen, along with my coffee and cigarettes. I have to admit seeing that line there got me needing it so bad. I can’t even explain it but being back on coke feels so good. I was going to try not to have a cigarette un...

I just did my 3rd half line so only did 1.5 total. We made love again and we have been literally talking and planning all day. I’m going to love living with him. I can do whatever I want which isn’t so much the case now. It won’t be long before I have full control. The plan is I will be staying with...

I just did the 2nd half of my first line. Now I know why I love it so much, and I already promised myself I will never quit again. Not going through that ever again. Once I’m fully moved in here after the baby I will be able to get back to the level I was before. I was so happy then. I’m on my 5th c...

I am getting this deja by feeling but in a nice way. New Mike is so much like old Mike but better looking and 1 huge difference. I am ultimately going to be with him. It’s a relief because I know now I will always do coke. Just having a half line and I realize how much I need and love it. We are goi...

I just text Justin to tease him. I told him this time I really will be moving in with my new man. I want to make sure it is what you really want, because once I do, I will never leave him, that’s a promise:). I am doing this for you because I love you so much. Our affair once started will be permane...

Mike told me he finally tried heroin and loved it, but he is not doing it often because he doesn’t want to get hooked. He asked me if I would do it with him after I have the baby. I said of course, I loved it! Wow, I’m so not used to doing lines anymore, and just a half line is still making me feel ...

Mike has to pop in the shower really quick. I am feeling as good as I have ever felt. I’m finally going to move in with someone that loves coke as much as I do, boy do I realize that now. I have to make sure Justin loves this arrangement so much he can’t think of anything else. Nicole will become hi...

OMG! I was literally shaking so bad knowing I was going to do a line! I feel so good right now. I did just a half size line. That is the longest I have gone without my lines since I was about 15. I’m never doing that ever again. I’m also having my first cigarette in months. What a feeling. Hard to e...

I couldn’t take it. I left for Mike’s already. I’m dying to do a line. I just stopped at the store to get cigarettes. I have never done a line without my cigarettes! Will be doing a line in about 20 minutes. So excited!

Also more good news

Pregnant moms using cocaine has less effect on infants than previously thought, says research

Now that I feel my sense of control which I love I told Justin if he ever mentions anything about coke that will be it. I don’t want him asking me. He said he already told me he doesn’t want to know, as long as he can have an affair with him. This is so perfect! I haven’t felt this good about myself...

I just read this: recent review, however, of scientific studies on the effects of cocaine use during pregnancy claims there is “no convincing evidence” that prenatal cocaine exposure is associated with negative developmental effects in children 6 years and younger. Poverty, not Cocaine To Blame In f...

I should clarify myself here before Grover throws me under the bus again lol. I’m not saying I will for sure be doing coke again. It is just a very good feeling knowing that if I want to I can now. Justin will love that I am with someone, and while I could move in with Mike, I want Justin more invol...

I have been so bummed out lately, but this is such a pick me up. I never knew he loved this so much. He never knew how much I love having full control and getting away with anything I want. I was feeling so depressed about my body and look, but now I can prepare for what comes next. I will make sure...

Justin and I made love this morning. Nicole had some things to do so we took advantage of our time together. He asked me if I thought after I finished breast feeding if I would ever think about doing coke again. I was honest with him and said some days I wake up still and would love to be doing a li...

So Nicole and I got into a conversation about hypno. She has never tried it before, and was curious if it would work on her. We started going back to Justin who really gets overcome by it, and we started talking about getting Justin hypnotized for something fun, but none of our ideas really hit the ...