I'm in Denver too, but probably not much help for the jock thing... Sorry.

There is also beach ball belly. Had went tried it yet, but should be right up your ally.

I wish all men would wear thongs instead of boxers or briefs. Granted, of course, men still wear pants just as they usually would so you see just as much underwear as usual. oh. an the instant disinterest in boxers and briefs cripples the undergarment business causing a small economical depression ...

Granted. It's too bad though that you had such a fine funeral and a lovely tombstone. You are restored to life, but how much air did you think was in the coffin?

I wish for the genie to be set free.

Granted, we do away with sex but now you can contract herpes from a toilet seat.

I wish for all of your dreams to come true.

Granted, everyone accepts you for being gay/bi. They do not accept you though for the hideous, slimy hared, deformed monster you have become from some freak accident, involving toxic waste, on your way home from work. I wish for whoever twists my wish to have three fold done onto them what is done o...

I'll have to agree with you there Nzltechnoz. Inflation would be great, but inflation whilst a woman would be fantastic.

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Granted, here is Amanda Hunginkiss

-why is it I feel that you where setting me up for that one?

Granted, but the universal office of justice has incredibly harsh criteria and "what everyone deserves" turns into rape and torture for 90% of the population, another 7% gets merely tortured and 3% get kittens.

I wish for my wish to be twisted.

Hello....



?

Trinidad (or as I like to call it: trimanad:) ) in Colorado is supposibly the sex change capital of the world.

well since nobody seems to be jumping (wait for the pun) at the chance to kill me, I take a few quick strides towards the edge of a tall building and watch as the earth comes rushing up at me.

calls up limitbreaker with an offer to try out a new zombie video game. The game is played as one of two people fighting off hoards of zombies on an alien planet. the game is so fuckin' awesome that limitbreaker soon becomes addicted. he can't seem to set down the controller and is drawn into the ga...

*Brings Martham's slippers, a warm glass of milk, and some fresh baked cookies* "here you go. You look exhausted, I hope that decapitation didnt wear you out too much. It seems like such hard work. Your so strong. Are you comfortable? can I draw a fire for you? fluff your pillow?" Killed Martham wit...

Sorry, I'm not completely sure what Salems are so instead enjoy your package of salami.

I wish to reserve the right not to make a wish.

*spawns as a cockroach, quickly finds rubbermusclepig, crawls into his ear and precedes to lay eggs within his brain.

Granted, but you where listening to the impossibly contradictory hypnosis that made you immune to the effects of hypnotic suggestion for the rest of your life.

I wish for my wish to be twisted.

Granted but you must pay my way and bring me along with you.

I wish for a silver dollar

Granted, it is in laten though and your pronunciation is terrible.

Granted; her is you tyme.

I wish for another wish.