It's been almost two months now, and my gut instinct was right... Guys you don't need expensive and pointless "therapy" to run your life into the ground. The simplest answer truly is the best one. My life isn't perfect and the feelings of despair will never go away, but they're just that.....

Well, I got on the drugs. The rest of my libido is diminishing. Considering asking for a higher dosage. Life still sucks and I can never unfuck the mess I made, but the rest of my desire is dying off, and I don't miss it. If there truly is nothing for me, why keep fighting? At least this way I get t...

I'm making this all sound worse than it is. The emptiness is slowly subsiding. Still get the urge but I've been training myself to react with revulsion to all things sexual, and the closer I get to this, the happier I feel in my good moments. Even if my plan doesn't work (assuming it doesn't horribl...

I've learned to run far, far away from anyone who uses the term "toxic person" or anything of the sort. The philosophy behind that term is really, really disgusting if you think about it. That is the kind of thinking people tried to push on me for years. Apparently that's the standard trea...

Therapists - supposedly professional ones - already ruined my life enough. The best thing I ever did was walk away from all of them as soon as I could and never look back. Bunch of thieves as far as I care. It's not like I'm the only person whose life has been destroyed. More people are coming forwa...

What demon? I didn't ask for this, it was an identity pushed on me, one I have to live with for the rest of my life. Mostly it's just flashbacks and my failed attempts to rebuild my own life by telling the flashbacks to go away. I don't like being a monster. I sure as hell never asked for it. I know...

By "chemical lobotomy" I mean antipsychotic drugs which have the side-effect of reducing libido. At this point, the side-effect would be a benefit. It wouldn't be the first time I've had to do this. Hoping that going through this process won't throw my life into ruin like it did before. It...

Well, now I can't even think about this without becoming morbidly depressed... even as a fantasy. I'm moving towards killing off the last vestiges of this stupid, stupid fetish; and along with it, I'm killing off any desire for sex at all. Better to be rid of this nonsense. I'm trying to go for drug...

Except... it really doesn't get better. Not when you're in the hole the way I am. I don't think you guys get what it means to live my life the way I have. I am the senile old man begging to stay out of the nursing home, and once that happens there is no way out, not ever. I looked over everything an...

I'm glad you're getting something out of it. I literally have no life now... just a few online games that are winding down, and living at home trying to take care of my mother. I think she has an idea of what I get up to, but is polite enough not to say anything. I'd be doing better now if there wer...

More fun - now I pretty much have permanent erectile dysfunction. Don't go down this path, there is nothing good about it. I ruined my life chasing after this shit. Just get out before it's too late. No one gets involved in this fetish without being broken in some way, unless they are exploiting los...

For what it's worth, at least thinking like this has killed off the problems I was complaining about. Now I just need to remind myself every single day that I'm a retard and never forget why I'll always be alone.

To hell with "healing". There is no life. There never was.

Illegal but they do it all the time. What am I going to do to protest - I'm just a retard after all, and because of that my word doesn't matter. They will automatically rule that I am a harm to myself because they believe me to be too retarded to live - I've been railroaded before and I will be rail...

Thanks to those who tried to respond, but it's pretty clear that I made a big mistake in forgetting what I am, and because of that most of the normal advice doesn't apply. Professional intervention will only mean coerced hospitalization and my life spent rotting in a nursing home, at best. I've seen...

I've been damned by people with far worse than Hellfire in the afterlife.

What I can't understand is this: Why are people are upset when Christians tell them they are going to Hell? If that is what a Christian believes, then it is what they believe. I see enough misery in this world.

I would say that it is impossible to have objective morality if you believe in God. A believer might think their morality is objective but they are wrong. Moral relativism is of course a dead-end and meaningless to argue for. Those who argue for moral relativism don't intend it for themselves - they...

Well the problem is simple - no one wants to touch me, and that is never going to change. It's probably for the best that I just stop trying to meet people and start doing what I should have done years ago. 30 years of pure rejection should have been enough, and I'm even more of a retard for thinkin...

If I really really tried, I proved to myself that I could get with some woman. It wouldn't last and I'd go through way more rejections than it's worth, and I'd get nothing out of it. It's getting more difficult with age and I haven't tried in years. The whole "stuttering mess" is an intrac...

Well, I succumbed again after telling myself for about two weeks to stay away from fd. I wasn't able to enjoy cumming until I caved and indulged in degrading fantasy. I just had a really nice one. What have I done to myself? Is there anything good in my life left? I feel terrible afterwards and keep...

Meeting a local hypnotherapist or any therapist is a non-starter. No money and a checkered past means I'd probably be booted out, plus I'm afraid to even mention this stuff to a professional based on past experience. Also, I'm limited in what I can seek or face my insurance being revoked (yay govern...

Thanks. It's not a particular tist, but a general addiction. I'm in a weird place because hypnosis doesn't really work as intended on me, and I keep chasing after someone who I think will work. The usual cycle is, find someone, listen to their work, download more of their files, then run into a bric...

Hi... apologies if this topic comes up often. I usually don't come around these boards. For several years I've been addicted to femdom files... unfortunately I get most caught up in love addiction, and going down that path has led to some dark places. I'm basically rejected by the women who offer th...

1 )Go to any place which sells cigarettes. Bring an ID in case that is necessary. 2 )Buy a pack of smokes. I recommend menthols, they are more tolerable for novice smokers. Some convenience stories (the shadier kind) sell loose cigarettes, which they're not technically supposed to do, but if you don...

Eat fatty foods, lots of HFCS, and don't exercise. Pretty soon you can have your very own lardy belly, just like me.

Don't become an alcoholic though. Cirrhosis is not fun. :(