Sarnoga, your file sucks.

[sarnoga]

Hello Everyone,

Welcome to the SARNOGA YOUR FILE SUCKS, thread. This is the place where you can share your opinion that this file really sucks. But no need to stop there. If you desire, you can even go a little farther and explain why the file sucks. Others are waiting to read your post. Express your opinion of this file.

WHO MAY PARTICIPATE

Everyone!

This thread is intended to be fun and informative. Everyone is encouraged to participate.

This is a premium file, but non premium members can participate too. Nobody will know the difference. The file is now available for free listening over at Hypno-Fetish.com. The link to Hypno-Fetish is to the left on the main menu. Go over and sign up for a free account today. You can find the file on Sarnoga's profile. You can't download it there, but you can listen to it for free, at least until it is taken down or replaced with another file. But hurry, sucky files don't stay up long.

To the individuals who have already privately commented on this file, thank you. But do not feel excluded, you too can participate in the Sarnoga Your File Sucks, thread. It will be fun.

THE FILE

On January 2, the following file was posted:

• Name: Sarnoga - Public Restroom Jerk Off
Description: Some things just happen and sometimes they happen to you. Sometimes you go into trance. Sometimes you find yourself masturbating in a public restroom. It just happens. Sometimes it happens to you. As you masturbate in the restroom you think you remember what happened, or maybe not. This file is for everyone and anyone who is allowed in a public restroom.

REASON FOR THIS THREAD

While this file is designed so that it can be used anyone, obviously this is not a file for everyone. It has been up less than a week at the time of this posting. As of this time the file has 47 downloads, and a rating of 2.75 with 4 votes and 0 comments.

It may be that some have downloaded it and not had a chance to listen to it, or haven't yet decided how they like it or what they think of it. But watching the change of rating with each vote has shown that the ratings are 1, 5, 1, 4. Perhaps not in that order.

That should mean that at least two people listened to the file and think it sucks. Maybe others would calculate the weight of a vote differently but it seems fair to say that if someone gives a rating of 1 they are saying that the file sucks. To rate it 5 is saying great file. Make what you will of the scale between.

Everyone has the right to say this file sucks, or that any file sucks. To rate it as they see fit, for any reason. Use that right now. Come say this file sucks. Everyone is being asked to do so and encouraged to further comment as they see fit. It is always fun to get feedback that says, great file. But it is not very informative or useful. It isn't any more useful to get feedback that only says, the file sucks. So lets make it more fun. Jump right in and have some fun. Find the best way you can to say this file sucks. Perhaps you will impart some useful information while you are at it about why it sucks. Ratings are fine, but they only say, sucky file, good file, in between file. That is not very useful. This is a chance for more useful feedback.

It seems there are very few people who post files here who are not looking for helpful comments from those who have listened to or reviewed their files. At times some very useful comments are received and are greatly appreciated. Many thanks to all those who were thoughtful enough to take the time to make them.

But even as nice as it is to get a comment or pm from someone saying, I loved your file. Without more information that is only of minimal use. When someone takes the trouble to say the file sucks, that is also thoughtful, but it is not very useful either and doesn't even have the benefit of being fun, most of the time. Though it is dreadfully amusing when someone says the file really sucks and it is obvious that the only thing they didn't like was the subject of the file. It means it got under their skin, or maybe even a bit into their mind, just by by being made and posted. (big smile)

However, useful comments, remarks, and suggestions are requested for this file in particular, and any other Sarnoga file that anyone would like to comment on.

WHAT TO DO WITH THIS THREAD

Tell everyone that this file sucks.

Please, those who think this file sucks, this is your chance to say so. You don't even have to stop there. You can tell everyone why it sucks. Explain how horrible it is and why. You can be specific and go into every little thing wrong with the file. Get picky. No detail is too small if it can be the subject of criticism, humor, or ridicule. Go as far as you like or just toss out a fault or two and stop. Insult it, trash it, say ugly things about it. This is the place to do it.

This is why the thread is titled, SARNOGA YOUR FILE SUCKS. Nobody will need to feel bad about posting that the file sucks or why it sucks. Go into as much detail as you like. Or, if you don't want to provide the chance to improve flies by giving details, you can at least make a point of saying, "Sarnoga, that file sucks." Or if you prefer you can say it REALLY sucks. Or get original and come up with something worse, or better.

So now is your time to shine. This is your chance to demonstrate what you can do. Expose the flaws. Be the first to find the faults that others have missed or were not sharp enough to recognize as faults. Perhaps you are even brilliant enough to take what others thought was one of the good things about the file (if there are any) and demonstrate why it is really a flaw. Use your imagination, and analytical abilities. The sky's the limit.

Feeling like you need to trash something. That is not uncommon. Think you might feel better really laying it out. Sometimes being really vicious can be therapeutic. No need to jump on someone here in the forum. Take out your frustrations on this file. Its, easy, its cheap, there are no bad and no hurt feelings or angry people, unless you manage to get in a fight with someone over who did the best job finding fault with the file.

Expose as many flaws in the file as you want. There is no need to stop at only one reason it sucks. Don't be embarrassed. You can go into all the reasons the file sucks, as many as you can find, as many as you can think of. Write down every little sucky thing about it. You can do it here and with the added benefit and satisfaction of telling everyone why the files suck. There is no limit of one to a customer. Put it all out there. You can even follow it, or precede it, by saying Sarnoga asked for it.

Perhaps you prefer to make fun of the file. That's great, welcome, come on in and get started. Mock and ridicule it. Make everyone laugh, if you want to, if you can. Show everyone what you can do, give us your best. Sometimes the sharpest of criticism is done this way. Sharp biting humor might be just the ticket for you. It may be what you are good at. Don't hide your talents, put them on display, trash this file today.

Nobody will be flamed, at least by me, for saying this file sucks, or why it sucks, or how badly, or simply for making fun of it. You are being asked to do it, who can fault you for doing what was asked. Be nasty, be humorous, or be sincere, whatever you want. Its up to you, every conceivable method of criticism is acceptable in this thread. It is encouraged. Whatever form it comes in, if you can think of it, it is allowed. Just because your preferred method of criticism wasn't mentioned doesn't mean you cant do it. If you accidentally go off topic and point out a good thing or two, don't worry, you will be forgiven.

So what are you waiting for. Don't be shy. Lets get started. If you don't think this file sucks enough to be worthy of your fiery criticism, or your barbed and biting humor, pick another file of mine that sucks even worse. There has to be some out there.

This is an open invitation to everyone. Who wants to be first?

Sarnoga

[ARGearCub]

As I start to write this, I'm first! WOO HOO, maybe I'll get it all down before someone else beats me to hitting Submit.

I've listened to the file once, haven't rated or commented on it yet. So I'll take the opportunity to do so now. I don't feel like the file sucks, I actually found it quite interesting. I normally enjoy the detail and length of your files, however, this one did seem more repetitive and longer to me. Although I admit that when I listened to it, I wasn't fully committed to it and did get interrupted because of that toward the end of the file. I plan to go back and listen again with the appropriate level of commitment.

The good? Well I don't know if it was intended or not, but the next day I really felt more like 'things just happen sometimes', I found myself thinking that several times during stressful situations at work and it seemed to help me stay calm. I didn't masturbate in the rest room, but I did think about it every time that I went in or near one.

Maybe not the level of trash talking you wanted, but hey at least I was first and I'm happy to give you feedback.

[sfhole2stretch]

I haven't downloaded or listened to this particular file because the subject matter isn't my thing. That said, I have listed to several other Sarnoga files and have found them all to be well thought, well executed and creative. All those I've listened I have enjoyed. My guess is Adby accounts for one of the low votes so you should completely discount the rating.

I find the rating system herein useless anyway. It's arbitrary and too easy to skew for who knows what reason. I rely on the author's reputation in my own book, comments and descriptions to make my listening decisions. In order for a rating system here to be competent it would need to allow for ratings on content, quality of recording, effectiveness, etc. within separate categories which it does not. It's therefore of very little account.

So, Sarnoga I wouldn't read too much into a low rating or lack of commentary on your latest file. Given your past work I'm sure it's just fine. I would only offer that the subject matter is rather specialized and will require persons interested in said subject to be effective. My guess is many folks here download all your new files based on experience with your earlier work. They may or may not find the new file interesting or their bag and simply just move on without commenting or rating.

Keep up the good work please. You are indeed appreciated here.

[xavious]

Make a polar opposite file to Masturbation Castration and I'll give you all the 5's you want. ;)

OK that sounds mean. I love your files and style in general; I don't tend to rate because I find it hard to rate. I don't like putting a value on how good a file is, I mean do I judge it on subject matter, on audio quality, how much I like the tists voice or how much I like the intention of the file?

[sleepyjosh]

Yes, this file definitely sucks. In fact, it sucked so hard, I came in like 30 seconds.

[sarnoga]

Thanks to everyone who has participated so far in the SARNOGA YOUR FILE SUCKS, thread. Sorry If I've been neglecting the thread. I had to leave out of town shortly after that posting but now I'm back.

So lets see how it is going, so far.

As I start to write this, I'm first! WOO HOO, maybe I'll get it all down before someone else beats me to hitting Submit.

Yay, ARGearCub scores 1 for being the first to post, and scores 1 for participating. Bet the rest of you wish you had been first.

I've listened to the file once, haven't rated or commented on it yet. So I'll take the opportunity to do so now. I don't feel like the file sucks, I actually found it quite interesting.

Awww, and you started out so well. But no points for that. Still, your slightly off topic compliment is forgiven.

I normally enjoy the detail and length of your files, however, this one did seem more repetitive and longer to me.

YES, now we are getting somewhere. Too long and repetitive. Duly noted. Score 1 more for AR. Wait, oooh, good shot. I almost missed it because you disguised it as a compliment, but you managed to say many of my files are too long and repetitive. Yes, sharp move. Score 1 more for AR.

Maybe not the level of trash talking you wanted, but hey at least I was first and I'm happy to give you feedback.

ARGearCub, thanks for the feedback and pointing out some good things about this file. It is always appreciated. But in this thread you only score for pointing out sucky things and trash talking. So lets see how you did.

Score : ARGearCub 4

Not bad. Lets see how everyone else has done so far.

I haven't downloaded or listened to this particular file because the subject matter isn't my thing. [remainder of post containing compliments on other files, encouragement and comments on the usefulness of the rating system, omitted.]

Thanks sfhole2stretch, that was a nice post, and I do appreciate the kind words. But in this thread, aside from getting 1 point for participation, you don't score anything for saying nice things or even for useful commentary. To score, a remark has to be pointing out a flaw, fault, or at least making fun.

I probably shouldn't do this, as its a bit of a stretch, but I started this thread so I guess I can do what I want until someone stops me. I am going to give you 1 additional point for trashing the subject matter as being unworthy to download and listen to. Yeah, I know that might not have been exactly what you had in mind, but I'm trying to be generous in the scoring and that is the best I can do. 1 for pointing out boring worthless file subject.

Current Score:

ARGearCub 4

sfhole2stretch 2

Ok, 4 to 2 in favor of ARGearCub. But xavious is about to weigh in. Lets see if there is going to be a challenge to ARGearCub's 2 point lead.

Make a polar opposite file to Masturbation Castration and I'll give you all the 5's you want. ;)

Oh yes, right out of the box. It isn't trashing this file, but the rules say trashing any Sarnoga file is fair game. Nice shot to the Masturbation Castration file. It is so bad that the polar opposite would be a great file. (would that be a file where you cannot masturbate or orgasm and your balls swell up like grapefruits?)

1 point to xavious for trashing Masturbation Castration.

OK that sounds mean.

Quit bragging. It was a start but it wasn't that good.

I love your files and style in general; I don't tend to rate because I find it hard to rate. I don't like putting a value on how good a file is, I mean do I judge it on subject matter, on audio quality, how much I like the tists voice or how much I like the intention of the file?

Awww, xavious, you made such a quick start but then fizzled out. Sorry, xavious. While your compliments are enjoyed and appreciated they do not score anything in this thread. Current score for xavious, 1 for participation, 1 for trashing another Sarnoga file. Total 2.

For those of you just tuning in, ARGearCub is still in the lead. sfhole2stretch and xavious are bringing up the rear, tied for second place. But sleepyjosh is about to try his hand. Let's see how he does.


Current Score:

ARGearCub 4

sfhole2stretch 2

xavious 2

Yes, this file definitely sucks. In fact, it sucked so hard, I came in like 30 seconds.

Amazing sleepyjosh. I think we have a real contender. Short, pithy, to the point. A score of three in only one sentence. That is talent. 1, for participation, 1 for trashing the file saying it definately sucks, 1 more for biting sarcasm. I like it. This young lad shows promise. But that only gives you a score of 3. Not enough to catch up to ARGearCub.

Current Score:

ARGearCub 4

sleepyjosh 3

sfhole2stretch 2

xavious 2


That leaves ARGearCub in the lead by the one point awarded for being first. I'll bet now the rest of you wish you had been first to post.

I would like to thank all participants for thier efforts. But it is too early to declare a winner. There may be more participants. Current participants may want to come back to earn additional points. Someone may even be inspired by some of the remarks already posted. I think that if any of the current participants come back for a second round sleepyjosh might easily take the lead, after his initial impressive showing of 3 points with only one sentence. But please remember, participation points are only awarded to first time posters to the thread. Participants posting a second time will need some real content to be awarded points.

So come on folks. Who wants to be next. Who wants to give it another go. The gold medal is still up for grabs.

Sarnoga.

[sarnoga]

A special thanks to all who participated in my scientific poll.

Sarnoga

[xavious]

If I had realised that our responses would be rated on how critical they were, I wouldn't have posted. I was actually being serious, but trying to be pleasant and friendly about it.

[sarnoga]

If I had realised that our responses would be rated on how critical they were, I wouldn't have posted. I was actually being serious, but trying to be pleasant and friendly about it.

xavious,

Your post was not taken as either unpleasant, or unfriendly. I'm sorry if you did not enjoy the scoreing. It was intended to be fun, not offensive.

Sarnoga

[xavious]

I don't know how badly you are taking peoples views and reactions to your files, but I felt that if it was enough to cause you to make a thread like this then I was concerned and wanted to offer to pleasant support. I feel that you are almost seeing it as an attack on you.

I can understand if you are upset because of how much work you obviously put into them, but all I can really say is just be comfortable in the knowledge that you are a good tist regardless of what a few unimportant people do on an internet site.

[JensDRK]

This file SUCKED. This file SUCKED the SUCKIEST SUCK that ever SUCKED a SUCKING SUCKER. I usually don't even post on these boards, but I was just SUCKED IN by this cataclysmic force of SUCK. It SUCKED so hard that it even SUCKED all my interest in listening to the file away before I got any; I didn't even have to listen to it to see HOW MUCH IT SUCKS. In my entire history involving erotic/fetish hypnosis, this single file stands out as the epitome of SUCK. I will now forever remember this file's creator as Sarnoga of the SUCK, the one true paragon of SUCKING at making files. If a vacuum cleaner made a file, it would SUCK less. If a behemoth sized sinking ship full to the brim with active water pumps made a file it would SUCK less. If a black hole made a file it would INFINITELY SUCK LESS.

This file has no redeeming qualities other than being the best at being the MOST SUCKIEST FILE EVER. The only thing that rivals JUST HOW SUCKY THIS FILE IS, is my INDIGNATION that something THIS SUCKY is even allowed to exist! There should be quality control for something that SUCKS this bad! There should be LAWS for things that SUCK THIS BAD! THERE SHOULD BE FIRING SQUADS FOR FILES THAT SUCK THIS HORRIBLY!!

If I had to pick a number to even being to equate how SUCKY this file is it would be >9000 digits long! If I had to pick a color for how much this file SUCKS it would be BABY VOMIT mixed with NORMAL VOMIT mixed with CAT VOMIT mixed with FECAL MATERIAL OF UNKNOWN ORIGIN riddled with hues of PINK and FAILURE! If I had to pick one word to describe it I would need two to say 'ULTIMATE SUCK'.

Even this thread, dedicated to the SUCK of this file, could NEVER EVEN BEGIN to describe just how SUCKILICIOUS this ABOMINATION IS. The fact that anyone can listen to THIS SUCK and survive afterwards IS A MIRACLE AND PROVES BEYOND A DOUBT THAT THERE IS A BENEVOLENT DIVINE BEING OUT THERE. But the fact that something that SUCKS this tremendously ATTESTS THAT THERE IS AN EVEN GREATER POWER WHOSE EVILNESS ALLOWED THE FORGING OF THIS ULTIMATE SUCK.

My SCIENTIFIC research believes me to believe that this SUCKING file SUCKED SO HARD, that it SUCKED a hole through space and time and is the creator of such SUCKY things as,
The SUCKGUE
The SUCKISH Influenza
SUCKOLIO
Auto Immune Disease SUCKDROME
The Common SUCKOLD

And almost every other SUCKY thing in HISTORY.


It SUCKS so badly that I would rather swallow A TEN GALLON HAT FILLED WITH NAILS, SCREWS, AND METAL FLAKES THEN CEMENT MY LEGS IN A ROOM MADE OF SUPER MAGNETS WITH ALTERNATING AND COMPLIMENTING PULSES FOR EACH WALL TO ENSURE HOURS UPON HOURS OF INTENSE PAIN UNTIL THE MICROMETER BY MICROMETER IT RUPTURES MY INSIDES TO THE POINT OF DEATH BY INTERNAL BLEEDING OR THEY FINALLY FIND THEIR WAY OUT AND I DIE BY NORMAL BLEEDING.

The combined ANTI-SUCK of EVERYTHING GOOD IN THE WORLD EVER hardly even puts a match to the INFINITE DARKNESS OF HOW MUCH THIS FILE SUCKS!

This file SUCKS SO MUCH, I would have to repeat everything here SEVENTEEN TIMES to EVEN BEGIN to describe the SUCKY SUCKISHNESS of this SUCKULAR SUCKSUCK SHITSUCK SUCKFACED SUCKTACULARLICIOUS SUCK SUCKS SUCK SUCKILY SUCKING SUCK SUCKING SUCK SUCKERS SUCKS.

So, in summery:
YOUR FILE SUCKS
I'm just kidding I love your work. Keep a stiff upper lip, thick skin, and don't let it get to you. If it's really good then I'm sure over time the average will come to reflect that. Elsewise, maybe your file really does SUCK. DEAL WITH IT.
SINCERELY,
ME 8) (Who doesn't suck, unlike some people)

[sarnoga]

This file SUCKED. This file SUCKED the SUCKIEST SUCK that ever SUCKED a SUCKING SUCKER. I usually don't even post on these boards, but I was just SUCKED IN by this cataclysmic force of SUCK. It SUCKED so hard that it even SUCKED all my interest in listening to the file away before I got any; I didn't even have to listen to it to see HOW MUCH IT SUCKS...............

(bunch more sucky stuff omitted)

So, in summery:
YOUR FILE SUCKS
I'm just kidding I love your work. Keep a stiff upper lip, thick skin, and don't let it get to you. If it's really good then I'm sure over time the average will come to reflect that. Elsewise, maybe your file really does SUCK. DEAL WITH IT.

Thanks Jens, much appreciated. Sarnoga.


SINCERELY,
ME 8) (Who doesn't suck, unlike some people)

Score: JensDRK 100

Wow, I'm impressed. No need to give a suck by suck analysis of this response. It scores the highest allowable score, a perfect 100. Though it should be noted that JensDRK did not even neglect composing an appropriate title for the post. Clearly anything off topic was sucked right off the page and undetectable to the naked eye.

My apologies to those who were still hoping to participate but had not yet gotten the chance, and to those who were hoping to come back to try to rack up a few more points, but I am going to have to close the contest and award the gold medal to JensDRK, for so eloquently pointing out just how much this file sucks. Congratulations, JensDRK.

Second place to ARGearCub with 4 points. Sleepyjosh takes third place with 3 points. Sleepyjosh also takes home the efficiency award for scoring his points all in one sentence. sfhole2stretch is runner up with two points and gets a certificate of participation.

I would also like to thank all the other participants in this thread. Anyone still desiring to post and show off their talents may do so, but the scoring is over and no additional points will be awarded.

Final score:

JensDRK 100

ARGearCub 4

sleepyjosh 3

sfhole2stretch 2

xavious (withdrawn by request)

Thanks again to one and all for participating in the SARNOGA YOUR FILE SUCKS, thread.

Regards,

Sarnoga.

[JensDRK]

Oh wow, there are a few things I'd like to say if that's alright.

First, to my coach, for believing in me even when I didn't, and teaching me that brute force, and repetition, makes up for any lack of technique. Next to my numerous adoring fans, you know who you are, for always cheering me on. And lastly to Sarnoga for sucking so horribly and giving me the chance to prove myself.

Thank you all. :wink: