Help: Script review and suggestions for bodybuilding +++

[Jeshi]

Sounds more like a mantra that you'd put on a loop in the background of a file. Actual suggestions usually need to be phrased more conversationally.

"From now on, you'll find that, every time your penis gets hard, it reminds you to eat healthy foods."

[sfhole2stretch]

Dig the premise and where you're going with it. I agree that it might be a little too direct like a mantra. Bodybuilders do .... and you find you want to be a body builder. I'd listen.

[joecomp2000]

good mantra
I don't think I could trance to it ... but definitely mantra while working out