by Aisakicha » April 25th, 2024, 6:38 pm
Sorry everyone, I logged in I think a few weeks ago at this point to do an update of what little there is but life got away from me some more. I've not had time for anything, I haven't been able to listen to the file more, nor any of the others really, even though I have wanted to.
However, it has been a very sticky file, for what it's worth. The "forced" word in the title feels... Exceptionally accurate, or at least it did particularly. The fantasies at this point have gotten quieter, but at the height of it, I really didn't have any control over them at the time. I just had to have those thoughts, and those thoughts were (and still are) arousing, which I think was a positive feedback loop. Some things became habit, like as the whether is getting warmer again finally, my eyes are wandering a lot and I cannot help it. I don't get horny from just looking anymore, but I do still deeply appreciate the female form. I haven't been able to act on it, but I do have a desire to, so maybe "success" on the losing the asexuality thing?
There has also been a very big, unexpected thing to stick with me from it. I have a deep feel of, "women should be lesbian." I think there might have been something in the file about listening to the file with other women, but it's been so long I don't remember exactly.