Ryan83 wrote:Done! On your recommendation I'm going to listen to Train Susceptible tonight and then the binaural version of CFG. :)
The only thing that bums me out is that I've been listening to Curse Stroke Sissy for the last week or so and out of nowhere I am suddenly developing feminine mannerisms. Which is amazing and I LOVE it. But now with this strip club thing coming up in two weeks, I really want to focus on CFG to try to make myself even more into guys in preparation. So I'm torn. But tonight I will listen to CFG and Train Susceptible, to be sure.
Also, this is the kind of thing (going to the strip club) that I would get excited about before than almost immediately, or at the very latest, the next day, cancel and get mad at myself and wonder what the fuck I was thinking and try to tell myself that I can reverse this. This time, I slept on it and could hardly WAIT today just thinking about it. I am so over the moon excited to go it's not even funny, and there's not a bit of doubt in my mind that I want to go and try this out. That's huge for me. So something's happening- whether it's the hypnosis or just pure acceptance, I don't know. Still not completely sure I won't want to reverse this still, but I'm definitely leaning toward no now.
Isn't Stroke Sissy intense? I'd never had any desire to act fem but I had the same reaction you did when I listened to it. What's more, the fem behavior is amazingly sticky, it seems to go right into your subconscious and trigger some quiescent female part and you find yourself doing the damnedest things, like swinging your hips as you walk down the aisle of a supermarket -- unconsciously, you just find yourself doing it. Even though I only listen to it occasionally I've found some of the effects sticky and permanent, Forex, I often have feminine gestures now, swing my hips when I walk, etc. It happens automatically and I'm surprised to find myself doing it.
It's been a while, but wasn't there a suggestion in Stroke Sissy about men and women? I edited the mentions of guys out so as not to create a conflict between it and Curse Forced Gay.
One thing I've noticed, if I didn't mention it -- I'm so much *happier* when CFG takes over totally! It's like all of the anxiety disappears and I start going crazy just seeing hot guys on the street, etc. I also get very at ease with my sexuality and don't mind at all telling people that I'm gay. But I still have traces of that voice that says you shouldn't have done this, it makes no sense. It all sounds a lot like what you're experiencing. I guess getting rid of it is a gradual process, Train Susceptible seems to make my trances deeper and better ever day, but it also seems to be an incremental process like Curse Forced Gay was. I'd say it's gotten me about 90% of the way so far.