Hypnotizing my wife

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Hypnotizing my wife

Postby ocntrl » February 10th, 2011, 8:42 am

This has been on my mind for a while now. So I am reaching out to this group to see if it helps me get my thoughts straight.

For some time now I have been thinking about hypnotizing my wife. Let me state that I would do this with her full consent. And that's where my first issue arises.

Although I have some files out here with some positive feedback, I do not feel very confident I can actually hypnotize her. Depending on her openness to the idea (still to be discussed with her) I am afraid it may be a total failure.

And since she has strong opinions on things, a strong negative opinion on hypnosis (there's indications she has them) makes it so much more difficult to be successful.

And I would really hate it when her first contact with hypnosis is negative. I really would like to have her experience something wonderful. We all know how wonderful trance can be.

So that's issue 1.

Second, I have to be honest, I am very much interested in using hypnosis (both as a hypnotist and subject) in our (sex) life. Now here it gets a bit trickier (assuming I get past the first hurdle).

Where does the line between leaving someone as they are, or gently moving them into a different direction, get crossed?

As an example, my wife loves to give head. But she hates the taste. So altering her perception of the taste in order to have her actually swallow, is that crossing the line or not. It probably is not when she agrees to try to change it. It probably is when it's done without her knowing.

Another example. She looks great wearing certain clothes (and I am not talking slut-wear, although that is fun too for play) but I just can not make her believe that. She will only see the flaws (like any woman I guess) and those make it impossible for her to enjoy that type of clothing.

So altering her perception of it, is that crossing the line or not?

So we come back to the first point. Anything I would try with her consent that fails would just make the whole experience bad.

Or am I completely wrong here?

I guess it boils down to insecurity and the fact I just want this to be a success.

So any constructive or experience based feedback is welcome.
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Postby Heartwould » February 10th, 2011, 3:19 pm

Hi, Ocntrl

We almost started a conversation about this, and I never got back to you. I apologize!

My thoughts on this are fluid. Mostly, if she has negative opinions about hypnotism, my first efforts with her would be fairly exclusively focused on how happy she feels when she is hypnotized, how relaxed and focused she is afterwards, how beloved she feels, and other positive reinforcements like that. Very gently, eh?

Once you notice that her opinion of hypnotism has improved (and it will, I'm sure), then gently breach sexual matters. This process might take a long, long time (months? a few years?) but the gentle approach is likely the best, overall.

I tend to think that introducing principles to your wife that she would agree with (such as strengthening her enjoyment of pleasing you) will have an effect on her opinions, as strident as they may be. At least, this is the idea I'm working with as I consider introducing subliminal files to my husband.

So, for example, if you hypnotize her (with her full agreement) and work with ideas such as the one mentioned above (strengthening her motivation to please you), and then, during waking hours, mention how much it would please you if she swallowed your cum, you never know what may happen.

It's a little manipulative, that's true. I suppose I don't see the harm in it, as long as she's not allergic to semen. Ultimately, hypnotism is about replacing someone else's will with your own. Where's the line? Nothing must be done to harm the children, and we're all earth's children - but does helping someone to get over a dislike of the taste of semen count as harm?

I dunno, but those are my two cents.

All the best
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Postby Fizbin » February 11th, 2011, 7:54 am

I really feel for you on this one. I suspect my wife is even more anti-hypnosis than yours is. (She reacted with complete horror when I told her how I got over one of my own inhibitions.) The chances of me bringing it it up with her are pretty much nil.

The irony is that she "naturally" goes into state so easily, that I'm sure she would really enjoy it. Nevertheless, I respect her feelings, and have no plans to introduce any trance or suggestions covertly.
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Postby yid01 » February 17th, 2011, 5:29 pm

ocntrl - I was in the same situation. I've had some luck here.

I'd been interested in hypnosis for a while, but when I brought the subject up I was quickly shot down. So, what I did was I started asking her:
- Was she satisfied with our sex life?
- Did things ever seem to be getting mundane?
- Is there anything she'd like to do / try to spice things up?

This was not a single conversation, but a conversation that took place over several weeks. The last question, especially, is one you want listen to her answer very carefully (and probably take notes on), because it'll tell you what turns her on. It may also take her a while to open up, so the answer you get when you ask the first time may not be the answer you get three weeks down the road.

She, during the course of this conversation asked me the same questions. I gave her my answers, but I omitted mentioning hypnosis (for now).

Just having this conversation did a couple of things. It really did improve our sex life, and it opened her up to try things.

After a few months, I took a look at her answers to the third question (above) and tried to figure out which ones would be a natural fit for hypnosis. Then, I brought up hypnosis again with the idea of using it in in a way that related to these particular answers. She then agreed to give it a try.

I had never hypnotized anyone before, so I wasn't sure what to do. I read everything I could on the subject and still made some mistakes at the beginning, so I'll give you the following advice:
- Be confident, at least on the outside (you may be jello on the inside, but don't let that show).
- First few times, use a relaxation induction
- After she's under, do one or two simple tests that she's 99% sure to pass (things like "eyes glued shut"). This is mostly to convince her that she's under.
- Once your done with the testing, verbally walk her through imagining either:
- one of her answers to the third question
- foreplay
- Give her the suggestion that when she wakes up you'll make passionate love
- Wake her up.
- After this first time don't ask to hypnotize her too often, it may be your fetish but it may not be hers (although hopefully she finds in enjoyable).

Good luck. Let us know how it turns out.
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Postby ocntrl » February 18th, 2011, 8:09 am

A very nice and useful answer yid01. Thank you for that.

Off course it begs the question... and how are you doing now with hypnosis and your wife? :-)
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Postby Fizbin » February 18th, 2011, 8:53 am

+1!
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Postby ocntrl » February 18th, 2011, 12:54 pm

Ahhhh... then we need details :-)
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Postby CharredSoul » February 19th, 2011, 6:45 am

do you know what it is specifically about hypnosis she doesn't like?
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Postby ocntrl » February 20th, 2011, 5:35 am

As I mentioned above, I do not really know.
It's a hunch based on some comments made related to hypnosis.
Of course, I may be jumping to conclusions and will only know when I brng up the subject.
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Postby CharredSoul » February 20th, 2011, 5:47 am

well people tend to have some form of negativity towards it until they are informed what it is and what it is not, but then again you do get the dogmatic people, that tend to think it is possesion and the work of the devil, just hope her beliefs aren't that intergrated. lol or maybe you can find away to utilise that belief
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Looking for a story

Postby mindovermatter » March 2nd, 2011, 8:42 pm

I am looking for a story that I can read to my wife or a conversation thread that is loaded with NLP and hypnosis triggers that could be used. during a massage or just a story read in front of the fireplace that would cause a trance state.

I can get her to sleep on my sholder but I think she may be going to deep and not in trance. I am getting her to breathe sometimes in her nose and out of the mouth, thinking that is more of a trance state.

I am also looking at some subliminal software that I can drop in with some of her favorite music. This I would want to load with triggers and patterns to ease later trance inductions.

Thoughts?
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Postby CharredSoul » March 3rd, 2011, 1:30 am

forget subliminals.

as for going too deep there is no such thing,all trance states are usable.

as for the story think of what you want her to experience, look for similarities between what you want her to experience and a metaphor. d not use direct quotes its too obvious.

a formal induction would be quite enough especially if she is willing to go into trance so would start there, introducing hypnosis slowly has great benifits over time. like planting a seed. guide her to a trance state, bring her out, see if she enjoys it, build up trust. then create an experience where trance is ratified. bring her out. then another time, build up feelings of feeling good about herself. bring her out. this is where they really start to enjoy trance. then again guide her in get her to feel pleasure, doesn't have to be sexual. bring her out. just keep building up from there.
all that could take a few days or less. in increaments has a greater effect reinforcing all those good pleasurable feelings. there is one thing do not fuck around with her mind especially if she is not willing talk about experiences both of you want to create.
then take it from there
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Postby mindovermatter » March 3rd, 2011, 3:45 pm

I am working on getting her in a more relaxed state. Currently she is bound up on worry for lots of different items. I thought I would try a warm oil massage, candle, and a move towards relaxing her body / mind and allowing her to express those feelings, affirm that I could see how she could have those worries and try to relax further. Not going to try and work on the worries, just try and gain good relaxation and breathing, look for her keys words on experincing happiness, satisfaction and potentially pleasure... let me know if there are any other states that are stronger and easier for later trigger.

Any phrasing on eliciting her feelings and getting her to describe them would be greatly appreciated.

I don't think she is ready for a formal hypnosis, however, I think I might be able to walk through the process, gain a lite trance and show her some benefits to repeat the process...over time, that process would become more triggered and more formal as needed.

My language options needs additional vairation. I have been listening to different tapes, but it would be easier to read the scripts....somehow have not been able to pull them.... I used natural like swatting a fly from your face and inconjunction with my natural as taking a breath and strong like an ocean way (which she enjoys), has helped... having the subconcious mind put the concsious mind to sleep seems to work..... still working on the subconcsiou mind breath in the nose and out the mouth... this actually helps me know when she is more likely in trance... I am getting muscle twitch which I have lead and trained in to experience when relaxing.

Sorry for length, just wanting to giv additional details for additional ideas and language usage improvments.... I have found variation can have a dramatic increase in effect.

Thanks for the reply
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Postby CharredSoul » March 5th, 2011, 6:16 am

if its language that you want to improve on there are a great deal of torrents out there for conversational hypnosis, but you still have to put in the practice there is also seduction techniques that are of great value in this area, how to use her trance states, her trance words ect...
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