Wanting to fulfil a long-time fantasy in diapers

[Ladon]

Mommy and I have had many long talks about what we truly want for me, if we are ever able to find someone capable of sharing such an experience with me. Here is some of what we're hoping for:

Mouse needs his diapers - When I hear this, my only desire would be to obey my mommy and let her diaper me, or do as I am told and put one on for myself. - This seems easy, considering I am able to do this voluntarily with my conscious mind.

You're such a baby - When I hear this, my bladder and bowels take control of themselves, or rather, my subconscious takes control of them from my conscious mind, and lets them empty as they fill, so I have no control until the next time I wake up from sleep. - This seems harder, but still achievable, since I can usually feign this consciously, meaning I could probably convince myself it is automatic.

Does mouse have to go? - When I hear this, I would hallucinate the feelings of a large bowel movement, and be compelled to bear down, perhaps squatting and grunting as necessary. If I did have to go, my bladder and bowels would empty in reality, but regardless of their real state, I would feel myself wetting and messing my diaper thoroughly. - This is my deepest desire, if I were able to be given such a gift. Currently, I am not able to even 'visualize' these feelings consciously, so I could at most "pretend" it was happening.

I love listening to Blink's Basic Induction, several Sarnoga inductions - including The Furniture Shop and The Road Home, and at this moment am listening to MindMaster's Poopy Pampers file. I also have the old DPF "solo baby, wet and messy" CD, from many years ago. I am very comfortable wearing diapers in public, and at home, and at all times, having worn 24/7 for months on end. I also find it very easy to relax my bladder, most of the time, but there are times it gets shy, usually when it is very full when I first wake up.

I am open to audio, text, or even in-person hypnosis, and willing to pay as well, if the hypnotist is confident they can produce the desired results. I have currently had very little visible success with any of the files I enjoy, though I often fall asleep to Blink and Sarnoga. I haven't noticed any tendency toward accidents, though I did wet the bed several weeks ago without a diaper on, but that was the first time since my last period of being 24/7.

Thanks

[Ladon]

Last night I told Mommy about the feelings I've been having lately, about how much I'm needing this treatment again. You see, I always like diapers, but every so often I get an achy craving for something I cannot yet attain.

I did spend several months, nearly half a year, in diapers full time. I was strictly following a program of no-holding-it-ever, in the hopes that I would eventually become completely diaper dependent.

Unfortunately, we had a sudden change in financial situation, and I had not yet lost any appreciable amount of bladder function, so we agreed that it was time for "big boy pants" yet again, until such time as we could afford diapers again. Finally, Mommy is going back to college and looking for a job in her chosen field, and I will likely be working from home in the next year or so. The budget is loose enough I could probably buy a year's supply of disposables when necessary, so that 'little' part of me is wanting to be expressed rather urgently.

Anyway, we talked a good long time last night, and I told her that I've been listening to my WMM files again, hoping that something will take hold. I want so bad to have my mommy take control. If she were able to offer me a "red pill/blue pill" choice right now, I would gladly accept a lifetime of incontinence, without a second thought.

Does anybody have some red pills? Please? :cry: