Twisted Wishes

by **Aestrius** » August 3rd, 2008, 12:04 pm

hypnostudent wrote:Granted, but it's the blue oyster bar from the hilarious Police Academy films.

I wish I had a better sense of humour.

Granted, but everyone you date finds it offputting

I wish I had watched police academy...

by **hypnostudent** » August 3rd, 2008, 4:41 pm

No, you don't. but in the spirit of the game. Granted, you leave the movie theatre with sore sides from laughing so much, wet panties / underwear from pissing yourself laughing, and some very embarrassed friends who accompanied you.

I wish I had a laptop.

by **gdawg28092** » August 3rd, 2008, 5:08 pm

Granted, but while using it you spill your drink electicuting your genitals they go permanately numb and you can never use them again.

I wish I could cum on command.

by **hypnostudent** » August 3rd, 2008, 5:10 pm

Granted, but it's MY command.

I wish I had an ice cream.

by **gdawg28092** » August 3rd, 2008, 5:41 pm

Granted, but you believe it's a plug and insert it up your butt.

I wish you would command me to cum.

by **hypnostudent** » August 3rd, 2008, 5:43 pm

Granted, every time you grant a twisted wish you can cum. But you forget your password to login to the site.

I wish I had an ice cream, I can't find my other one.

by **Aestrius** » August 3rd, 2008, 5:52 pm

hypnostudent wrote:Granted, every time you grant a twisted wish you can cum. But you forget your password to login to the site.

I wish I had an ice cream, I can't find my other one.

granted, you finally remember where it was.

I wish I could find those personal assistant files that Akir made

by **hypnostudent** » August 3rd, 2008, 5:56 pm

Granted, but you then forget what you wanted them for.

I wish I had a hot water bottle to sit on.

by **hypnostudent** » August 3rd, 2008, 5:59 pm

Granted, but now you forget the URL to the site.

I wish I wasn't sat up at 1am replying to posts on this thread 2 minutes after they are posted.

by **gdawg28092** » August 3rd, 2008, 5:59 pm

Granted, It burst and u now have a red ass.

I wish I could remember My login.

by **hypnostudent** » August 3rd, 2008, 6:06 pm

Granted, but now the fuse on your computer has blown.

I wish I had some cream for my sore botty.

by **gdawg28092** » August 3rd, 2008, 6:12 pm

Good thing I had another computer.
Granted, But its cream of chicken soup and the dog wants top lick u clean.

I wish everyone could get there wish.

by **hypnostudent** » August 3rd, 2008, 6:17 pm

Granted, but they have to ask here, and run the gauntlet with all of us.

I wish I had more doggies.

by **gdawg28092** » August 3rd, 2008, 6:25 pm

Granted , but no more cream of chicken.

I wish I could have a party and Invite all My new friends from WMM.

by **hypnostudent** » August 3rd, 2008, 6:36 pm

Granted, both your friends turn up to the party, but you forget to book the clown, and the ice cream melts, and no realises it's a kid's party.

I wish I wasn't sat on the toilet answering this thread with my phone.

by **CycoMelody** » August 4th, 2008, 9:59 am

Granted you are now floating in the toilet about to be flushed down.

I wish this file I'm listening to would work.

by **Flow123** » August 4th, 2008, 10:31 am

Granted, it works, but your mind interprets the suggestions wrong.

I wish there was a file for speed reading.

by **Aestrius** » August 4th, 2008, 10:58 am

Granted, but its in dutch

I wish I had a tail

by **Flow123** » August 4th, 2008, 11:04 am

Granted, you do, the one they cut off of you when you were a baby, its in a jar on your shelf.

I wish I had some iced tea.

by **hypnostudent** » August 4th, 2008, 11:12 am

Granted, but it's the bottle I as drinking earlier today, and it's nearly all gone.

I wish I had a pony to tease CycoMelody with

by **Aestrius** » August 4th, 2008, 11:32 am

hypnostudent wrote:Granted, but it's the bottle I as drinking earlier today, and it's nearly all gone.

I wish I had a pony to tease CycoMelody with

Granted but the pony likes to tease you (rape)

I wish these hypnosis files would work faster so I could have full cat ears instead of just partial ones.

by **CycoMelody** » August 4th, 2008, 1:18 pm

Granted. The file works with flying colors but... you quickly come to the realization that it is actual cat ears. The world around you now considers you a freak. You lose your job, your family, home and you wind up working minimum wage in a carnival freak show.

I wish my mind were more twisted. :p

by **Aestrius** » August 4th, 2008, 1:44 pm

Impossible. so I grant you a second mind, your head explodes and your family refuses to have a funeral because your disfigured body is so grotesque

I wish I had a puppy.

by **gdawg28092** » August 4th, 2008, 1:59 pm

Granted, but it is stuffed and still won't play with you.

I wish I knew what files would work for me.

by **Flow123** » August 4th, 2008, 2:51 pm

Granted... Looks like it's only CurseSissyStroke.

I wish that the files worked a little faster on me.

by **hypnostudent** » August 4th, 2008, 3:36 pm

Granted, and before you know it you've worked your way through all of the curse files, and now you are a horny, shemale, furry, maid.

I wish I could think of decent twisted responses to post back with.

by **Aestrius** » August 4th, 2008, 3:46 pm

hypnostudent wrote:Granted, and before you know it you've worked your way through all of the curse files, and now you are a horny, shemale, furry, maid.

I wish I could think of decent twisted responses to post back with.

Granted, you no longer use furry to imply a curse. :cry:

I wish Hypnostudent was incredibly attracted to midget horse lebrechuns.

by **hypnostudent** » August 4th, 2008, 3:52 pm

Granted, OH MY GOODNESS ! What *HAVE* I DONE ?

I wish I wasn't so attracted to those gorgeous, lovely, creatures.

by **gdawg28092** » August 4th, 2008, 4:11 pm

Granted, you find them repulsive, but they still have you tied down taking turns on you!!!

I wish I could trade places with a woman during sex.

by **Flow123** » August 4th, 2008, 4:36 pm

Granted. Now she's on top.

I wish i could be that woman.

by **tecywiz121** » August 4th, 2008, 6:42 pm

Granted, but gdawg28092 is below you

I wish that I was Irish

by **Aestrius** » August 4th, 2008, 6:43 pm

tecywiz121 wrote:Granted, but gdawg28092 is below you

I wish that I was Irish

Granted, you get into a bar fight and die

I Wish I had a radish. (twist that)

by **Flow123** » August 4th, 2008, 8:48 pm

Granted. It is a monster killer radish from another dimension. It eats you and then terrorized the world!

I wish I had more hair on my head.

by **CycoMelody** » August 4th, 2008, 9:15 pm

Granted but you are now stuck with the infamous Joe Dirt Mullet. And its just as dirty.

I wish someone would try to untwist my mind. :P (twist that once. I dare ya :p)

by **Flow123** » August 4th, 2008, 9:47 pm

Granted, someone thrusts their hands though your skull, grabs two good handfuls of grey matter, and untwists. Ouch.

I wish people wouldnt get so mad sometimes.

by **SDoll** » August 4th, 2008, 9:47 pm

CycoMelody wrote:Granted but you are now stuck with the infamous Joe Dirt Mullet. And its just as dirty.

I wish someone would try to untwist my mind. :P (twist that once. I dare ya :p)

Granted. Now you are an extremely normal boring person with no personality what so ever.

I wish I could have a wish granted.

by **Flow123** » August 4th, 2008, 9:55 pm

Granted make a wish.

I wish I was faster.

by **jayjedi** » August 4th, 2008, 10:17 pm

Granted, you move so fast that you leave the Earth's gravitational field and hurtle into space and crash into the Moon. Ouch!

I wish that I didn't have to go poop.

by **CycoMelody** » August 4th, 2008, 10:31 pm

Granted. You are so bound up your belly distends so much you look 9 months pregnant and you begin throwing up crap.

I wish I could hypnotize the planet! :twisted: :twisted: :twisted:

by **Aestrius** » August 4th, 2008, 11:48 pm

CycoMelody wrote:Granted. You are so bound up your belly distends so much you look 9 months pregnant and you begin throwing up crap.

I wish I could hypnotize the planet! :twisted: :twisted: :twisted:

Granted, you must control everyone at once, including yourself

I wish I had a tame giant killer radish

by **cisvestite** » August 5th, 2008, 7:12 am

Aestrius wrote:
CycoMelody wrote:Granted. You are so bound up your belly distends so much you look 9 months pregnant and you begin throwing up crap.

I wish I could hypnotize the planet! :twisted: :twisted: :twisted:

Granted, you must control everyone at once, including yourself

I wish I had a tame giant killer radish

Granted, but it attracts hordes of not-so-tame giant killer vegetable weevils.

I wish for infinite wishes.

by **Flow123** » August 5th, 2008, 7:57 am

Granted, but you must wish for all of them before any of them is granted.

I wish i didn't have to work today.

by **gdawg28092** » August 5th, 2008, 8:33 pm

Granted, but you sleep till tomorrow and don't get to enjoy it.

I wish I my cock was bigger.

by **cisvestite** » August 5th, 2008, 11:37 pm

Granted, but it's so big and holds so much blood that when you get an erection, you lose consciousness.

I wish I could shapeshift.

by **Flow123** » August 5th, 2008, 11:53 pm

Granted, but you can only shapeshift into an inanimate cube.

I wish everyone in the world switched genders.

by **hypnostudent** » August 6th, 2008, 7:56 am

Granted. Everybody did. Twice.
Except or you, who had to go one better, and did it three times.

I wish my latest email slave hadn't bought a Kylie Minogue album online while he was in his new 'gay' persona. He was rather shocked when it came in the post this morning.

by **Flow123** » August 6th, 2008, 12:27 pm

Granted, he bought Britney Spears instead. Still shocked.

I wish I had a magic wand. Any kind will do.

by **hypnostudent** » August 6th, 2008, 12:35 pm

Granted, it's like the one that magician's get members of the audience to hold while helping. You know the one's they go floppy as soon as anyone gets hold of it.

I wish I had a laptop, a banana, and a pony.

by **Aestrius** » August 6th, 2008, 12:53 pm

hypnostudent wrote:Granted, it's like the one that magician's get members of the audience to hold while helping. You know the one's they go floppy as soon as anyone gets hold of it.

I wish I had a laptop, a banana, and a pony.

Granted, they are both inside the pony.

I wish I had a way to speed up time to the exact moment I wanted.

by **hypnostudent** » August 6th, 2008, 1:23 pm

Granted. Although time does speed up for you, it's really a suggestion that makes you a vegetable for that amount of time.

I wish my laptop was waterproof (and stomach acid proof) and that I had a bottle of laxative to give the pony. Oh, and a new banana.

Twisted Wishes

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