WarpMyMind

Posted: **August 6th, 2008, 3:01 pm**

Granted. Your laptop is dipped in liquid plastic, now completly encased in hard plastic. The laxatives appear in your stomach(no need to go into detail about whats about to happen there). Aaaaand the banana is rotten to the core.

I wish I could transform into an anthro at will, and be able to make the form EXACTLY how I want.

Posted: **August 6th, 2008, 4:28 pm**

Granted, you can become an anthro whenever you want, and it is formed exactly how you want. Bad news is, you wanted to be a mouse at the exact moment a hungry cat was walking by.

I wish that I had more clothing that fit

Posted: **August 6th, 2008, 4:31 pm**

Granted. It does fit. but not you.
That elephant is very grateful for your cast-offs.

I wish I had a yoghurt right now, but I can't be arsed walking to the fridge.

Posted: **August 6th, 2008, 4:34 pm**

Granted, you have a yogurt in front of you, bu the spoons are on top of the fridge

I wish my dead pixels would come alive again

Posted: **August 6th, 2008, 4:37 pm**

granted, your dead pixels are now alive, but like that fine comedy drama 'Pushing Daisies' some other pixels die in their place 60 seconds later.

I wish I had a long enough tongue to reach the bottom of this yoghurt pot.

Posted: **August 6th, 2008, 4:56 pm**

Granted, you are now a freak, with a long tongue. Soon after you join a rock band and make it big, then sadly die of a drug overdose

I wish... for my own cat

Posted: **August 6th, 2008, 5:01 pm**

Granted. Have fun with your new new man-eating tiger, that has been deprived of food for the past 4 days.

Hmmmm...might as well, I wish for world peace

Posted: **August 6th, 2008, 5:16 pm**

Granted. Warring nations on the planet Klandathu have lain down arms against each other. They have agreed to destroy that distant planet earth, with all its stupid monkey people.

I wish I could make portals like in the game... Portal.

Posted: **August 6th, 2008, 5:58 pm**

Granted, but you make one right below you, and right above, so you can fall forever. Too bad you dropped the gun and are stuck falling.

I wish that I had a companion cube

Posted: **August 6th, 2008, 6:52 pm**

Granted. You have a companion cube for life. Whenever you look at it, you know its nagging you, complaining about everything you do, and you really wish you had an emergency intelligence incinerator nearby.

I wish I could find what I was looking for.

Posted: **August 6th, 2008, 8:55 pm**

Granted but it is like a snake. It jumps up and bites you. The venom is very toxic as you quickly find out. You drop to the ground begin to convulse, thrashing around like you are having a seizure. The venom enters your brain and you die slowly and painfully wishing it were finally over.

I wish That could have been summed up in fewer words.

Posted: **August 6th, 2008, 9:40 pm**

Granted: Found snake, bite bad, die.

I wish IT were over.

Posted: **August 7th, 2008, 4:55 am**

Granted. People collectively decide to abandon information technology. Everyone off the internet!

I wish I were done with my degree.

Posted: **August 7th, 2008, 5:26 am**

Granted, all 500 degrees and your done medium well.

I wish I were on vacation.

Posted: **August 7th, 2008, 10:26 am**

Granted, a lovely vacation to Switzerland is yours for free. Unfortunatly, while you are there, the CERN Large Hadron Colider shielding fails as you are visiting near the facility. Sorry to say, the blackhole created by the LHC stays alive just long enough to suck you into it.

I wish that Swiss scientists weren't allowed to create blackholes that could potentially destroy the entire world.

Posted: **August 7th, 2008, 11:08 am**

Granted, they can only destroy your section of it.

I wish I had less work to do

Posted: **August 7th, 2008, 3:22 pm**

Granted, But now all you do is masturbate, soon you will die of exhuastion and dehydration from the loss of bodily fluid!!!

I wish I could remember how I got in this game.

Posted: **August 7th, 2008, 4:40 pm**

Granted, you made a wish, but now you're stuck

I wish that I win the caption contest

Posted: **August 7th, 2008, 10:02 pm**

Granted, You won because your the kid on the plane.

I wish I could have sex anytime with anyone, anywhere.

Posted: **August 8th, 2008, 9:39 pm**

Granted, you are now a rabbit.

I wish I lived in a bigger city

Posted: **August 8th, 2008, 9:47 pm**

Granted. You find yourself the size of an ant, in the middle of a busy city sidewalk.

I wish I didn't procrastinate so much...

Posted: **August 8th, 2008, 10:03 pm**

Granted, you give up before you even start

I wish the summer were over

Posted: **August 8th, 2008, 10:27 pm**

Granted, the nuclear war happens, and plunges the world into nuclear winter.

I wish there wasn't a fly in my computer room, every single freakin day.

Posted: **August 8th, 2008, 11:40 pm**

Granted, all of your jeans break, no more zipper

I wish I didn't stay up so late

Posted: **August 9th, 2008, 10:42 am**

Granted, now you sleep till 11am and go back to bed at 1pm, you might as well not even exist.

I wish I had something good to eat.

Posted: **August 9th, 2008, 2:38 pm**

Granted, you have a really nice steak. It was from a mad cow

I wish I had a really nice, untainted, steak

Posted: **August 9th, 2008, 6:04 pm**

Granted. *Hands you a steak shaped chew-toy*

I wish I was better at making hypnotism files.

Posted: **August 9th, 2008, 9:32 pm**

Granted, but you lose your voice

I wish my chewtoy was a cat toy

Posted: **August 10th, 2008, 8:57 am**

Granted, It's a cat toy but your a mouse.

I wish I had a dominant wife.

Posted: **August 10th, 2008, 3:44 pm**

Granted, but now she stops you visiting WMM.

I wish I had a job closer to home.

Posted: **August 10th, 2008, 4:23 pm**

Granted, you now clean sewers outside your house, and around the neighborhood.

I wish that who ever grants this wish has to type backwards forever

Posted: **August 11th, 2008, 11:48 am**

Granted , but it only affects my numbers, and I am the one filling out your paycheck. pay to the order of 00.003 .

I wish I could meet Isabella Valentine.

Posted: **August 12th, 2008, 6:48 pm**

Granted, but you have no idea what happened to your money, your car or your genitalia.

I wish I were a Master of Neurolinguistic Programming.

Posted: **August 12th, 2008, 9:57 pm**

Granted, but now every time you talk, people fall into a deep trance and don't wake up for hours.

I wish I know what files would have the best effect on me

Posted: **August 12th, 2008, 11:36 pm**

Granted, unfortunatly, they are no longer available.

I wish my furry companion from the file series was real, exactly how I have envisioned and developed her.

Posted: **August 13th, 2008, 11:08 pm**

Granted, she's perfect exactly what you wanted, only she hates u for bringing her out of the fantasy world.

I wish I could make every woman in the world orgasm at the same time.

Posted: **August 14th, 2008, 12:24 am**

Granted. but the resulting moans shift Earth's orbit away from the sun, starting an ice age

I wish I had a bowl of sun chips

Posted: **August 14th, 2008, 12:35 am**

Granted, But Sun is the name of a your cow!

I wish I could stop this Iceage

Posted: **August 14th, 2008, 1:46 am**

Granted, you now have the ability to stop the Iceage through sheer heat. Unfortunalty, through lack of control, if you were to use this power you would light the earth's atmosphere on fire.

I wish my companion didn't hate me

Posted: **August 14th, 2008, 8:51 am**

Granted, you hate them

I wish my hot chocolate wasn't too hot

Posted: **August 14th, 2008, 11:11 am**

Granted, now it's just chocolate. runny chocolate.

I wish my train journey were over successfully, at my destination, and the pretty girl opposite agreeiing to listen to, and susceptible to, emal slave when she gets home.

Posted: **August 18th, 2008, 1:33 pm**

Granted, But you forgot her email address and her name.

I wish my erotic dreams would come true.

Posted: **August 18th, 2008, 6:10 pm**

granted but it isn't your erotic dream, it's furries who is very into vore (eating other species) and you happen to be on the menu.

I wish the city didn't haft to work on my street repairing pipes.

Posted: **August 18th, 2008, 6:36 pm**

Granted, the problem with the pipes actually lies under your house. They have to work in your house.

I wish I had listened to Trig Orgasm first instead of what I listened to.

Posted: **August 18th, 2008, 8:10 pm**

Granted, but you ended up listening to Cal's Curse after, and it worked

I wish for an HD tv

Posted: **August 19th, 2008, 1:31 am**

Granted, but the TV is posessed by C'thulhu and the other Old Gods.

I wish I could think of the perfect curse word.

Posted: **August 19th, 2008, 10:45 am**

Granted, but it summons C'thulu and the Great Old Ones and tecywiz's TV.

I wish I was a little braver to try some of these other files. :-o

Posted: **August 19th, 2008, 11:26 am**

Granted, but get your bravery by listening to email slave, and me emailing you suggestions. The trouble is you misread the word tennis and think it said penis, and ... well, let's not go there.

I wish this train could fly and I get home quicker.

Posted: **August 19th, 2008, 11:40 am**

Granted, however, the conductor never got his pilot's license.

I wish that I could trance and act on suggestions without people being wierded out.

Posted: **August 19th, 2008, 9:51 pm**

Granted, you are now alone in the universe

I wish that I could remember the name of the standard suggestibility scale...

WarpMyMind

Twisted Wishes