WarpMyMind

Posted: **September 22nd, 2008, 6:39 pm**

Granted... I'm not quite sure what a botty is, but it sounds like something is probably inserted.

I wish I never met Bubba or his friends.

Posted: **September 22nd, 2008, 7:26 pm**

Granted you are just now meeting bubba and his friends. His friends promptly bend you over and one of them begins riding you like a pony, while bubba threatens to knock out all of your teeth if you don't blow him.

I wish I wasn't so damn lonely.

Posted: **September 22nd, 2008, 7:28 pm**

Granted, you're now in the same room - next in line to meet Bubba and friends.

I wish today hadn't happened.

Posted: **September 22nd, 2008, 7:30 pm**

Granted, today will happen tomorrow, which will become today, well, right after yesterday.

I wish that made more sense.

Posted: **September 22nd, 2008, 7:31 pm**

Darn beat me to it!

Posted: **September 22nd, 2008, 7:32 pm**

Granted, it makes perfect sense, and all other logic in the world breaks to match.

I wish for a spoonful of sugar (with no medicine)

Posted: **September 22nd, 2008, 9:43 pm**

Granted, but its covered in bees.

I wish you could get the women without the sugar and the power.

Posted: **September 22nd, 2008, 10:25 pm**

Granted, you re now married.

I wish I knew how to finish my program...

Posted: **September 22nd, 2008, 11:40 pm**

Granted, you know, but this dark forbidden knowledge causes you to go completely insane. Committed to the local asylum, you go realize that in fact the Old Ones are rising, and the only way to stop them is to properly run your own incomplete program, but know one will listen to you, and you watch the world spiral into dark and evil chaos around you.

I wish that I could shapeshift at will.

Posted: **September 23rd, 2008, 2:11 am**

Granted, but you can only shape shift into things that people don't want to touch or think about.

I wish I had the powers of the Force.

Posted: **September 23rd, 2008, 11:40 pm**

Granted but you get arrested for using excessive force and end up thrown in jail with darth bubba.

I wish I didn't haft to go to work so early tomorrow.

Posted: **September 24th, 2008, 12:11 am**

Granted, you have to go to work right now.

I wish i had more time!

Posted: **September 24th, 2008, 8:39 am**

Granted; her is you tyme.

I wish for another wish.

Posted: **September 24th, 2008, 9:12 am**

granted, but it will be twice as twisted

i wish i had the same powers as superman

Posted: **September 24th, 2008, 1:24 pm**

Granted, but you can't get them to work.

I wish I knew, 10 years ago, what I now know.

Posted: **September 24th, 2008, 9:12 pm**

Granted, but in a moment of civic duty, you alerted the U.S. Government of the events of 9/11, in an effort to avert them. Three and a half years later, you were picked up for questioning, and have never been seen since. Your family sends their letters to Guantanamo Bay.

I wish I knew the Secrets of the Kaballah.

Posted: **September 28th, 2008, 3:06 pm**

Granted, but in the thousands of years you spent learning them all, humanity ended, and now you have no one to share with.

I wish for what I wish for.

Posted: **September 28th, 2008, 11:24 pm**

You happen to wish for a night in jail with bubba, and that wish is twisted enough.

I wish that the 28 hour day would work for me

Posted: **September 29th, 2008, 12:26 am**

It does, your 28 work day does work for you, however, everyone is on a 24 hour day. You find yourself aging more rapidly than everyone else around you. People notice, and take you to preform tests on you. One of the tests involves Doctor "Bubba"... and enough said.

I wish I had a gender ray gun.

Posted: **October 1st, 2008, 3:00 pm**

Wished granted. Your gun works on people named Ray.

I wish I could hypnotize anyone and everyone easily, quickly and absolutely.

Posted: **October 1st, 2008, 9:57 pm**

granted, it works so well you end up under your own will.

I wish for a pie for everyone

Posted: **October 2nd, 2008, 8:52 pm**

(Twisting two wishes)

Granted, but you forgot yourself

Granted, but Bubba is the only one around who'll share, and not in the way you want

I wish for a more comfortable bed

Posted: **October 2nd, 2008, 10:21 pm**

Granted, but it's in death row, and you just ran out of appeals. Enjoy the comfy bed while you can, because your execution's scheduled for Tuesday.

I wish I was 18 months old again, and forever.

Posted: **October 3rd, 2008, 8:29 pm**

You are 18 months based on Mercury which puts you around 88 years old.

I wish for something to do that I would enjoy a lot. I would not enjoy Bubba or his friends.

Posted: **October 3rd, 2008, 8:44 pm**

Granted. You do something extremely enjoyable that doesn't involve Bubba and his friends... however, Bubba and his friends can't stand Big Jim, who you spent the weekend with. The experience was so enjoyable, you repressed the memory... and by "enjoyable," I mean "traumatic."

I wish I had a larger pacifier.

Posted: **October 3rd, 2008, 10:46 pm**

Granted, say hello to your new couch :)

I wish to be amazing.

Posted: **October 13th, 2008, 9:56 pm**

Granted, you are now an amazingly smelly pile of poo.

I wish my hair were red.

Posted: **October 15th, 2008, 12:49 am**

Granted. It WAS red.

I wish for a Dodge Viper!

Posted: **October 15th, 2008, 7:41 am**

Granted. You get stuck in your car because of the child lock system, parked in a garage. The only way to get out of there is to demolish your car by going into every walls of the garage. Plus, the gas turn to be 10$/gallons.

I wish to have a boyfriend of my age who would be also a good master as I am his personnal slave and enjoy everything he want me to do.

Posted: **October 16th, 2008, 8:38 am**

Granted, 112-485-334... meet Bubba.

I wish my boobs would grow to G cups.

Posted: **October 23rd, 2008, 11:12 pm**

Granted, but no Jehovah's Witnesses ever come to your door, they just call constantly

I wish to see Corteo again!

Posted: **October 24th, 2008, 12:19 am**

Granted but you must pay my way and bring me along with you.

I wish for a silver dollar

Posted: **October 24th, 2008, 6:46 am**

granted but the value of silver falls to just below the value of dirt.

I wish my back would stop hurting.

Posted: **October 24th, 2008, 6:23 pm**

Granted. It doesn't hurt, but it's not there any more. You no longer have a backbone. You end up a pile of flesh and bones flumped on the floor.

I wish someone would read my hair fantasy post on the forums, and send me some information.

Posted: **October 25th, 2008, 6:27 pm**

Granted, They read it but dislike it immensely.

I wish someone would have granted my previous wish.

Posted: **October 25th, 2008, 6:32 pm**

Granted, they would have, but they were too busy granting mine.

I wish someone would help me with describing how having a perm done feels, sounds and smells.

Posted: **October 25th, 2008, 11:44 pm**

Granted, they describe it once to you, in Korean.

I wish I could talk to some of the cute girls in Taiwan... gah, there are so many.

Posted: **October 26th, 2008, 6:56 am**

Granted. You can talk to some of them. Unfortunately you don't speak a common language.

I wish for no more wishes.

Posted: **October 26th, 2008, 8:27 am**

Granted but the mishes only stop for an hour.

I can't make a wish since they stopped for an hour.

Posted: **October 26th, 2008, 8:54 am**

Since Gannon failed to make a wish I shall grant his hearts desire, He wakes up in the morning to find Bubba spooning him.

I wish someone would put Bubba back in his cage while Im 1000 miles away from him.

Posted: **October 26th, 2008, 10:58 am**

Granted, but unfortunately, well for Gannon at least, he refuses to let go of Gannon and takes his new 'teddy bear' into the cage with him.

I wish, I wish, I were a fish.

Posted: **October 26th, 2008, 8:46 pm**

Granted, but you find yourself in a fisherman's net and sent to a processing plant to be turned into someones dinner.

I wish I were a doll

Posted: **October 27th, 2008, 11:35 pm**

Granted you are a doll and little bubba got a hold of you and some m80s now you are a doll in pieces.

I wish the holiday season was over allready.

Posted: **October 28th, 2008, 9:03 am**

Granted, the whole year passed and now its the holiday season again.

I wish we had better presidential candidates to choose from

Posted: **October 28th, 2008, 9:14 am**

granted write in "none of the above"

I wish everyone would write in "none of the above"
this year

Posted: **October 31st, 2008, 8:29 am**

Granted , but a new amendment makes none of the above combine candidates. so instead of a Pres. and VP we get 2 Pesidents. ObamaCaine in 08.

I wish I could get some real results from my hypnosis.

Posted: **November 1st, 2008, 12:38 am**

Granted, but you where listening to the impossibly contradictory hypnosis that made you immune to the effects of hypnotic suggestion for the rest of your life.

I wish for my wish to be twisted.

Posted: **November 1st, 2008, 10:10 am**

I wish this thread ended.

Posted: **November 1st, 2008, 3:57 pm**

Granted. But in me granting this wish the wish gets twisted and the thread resumes just as before.

I wish that made sense to me.

Posted: **November 1st, 2008, 4:11 pm**

Granted then your head blew up.

i wish Fallout 3 was real.

WarpMyMind

Twisted Wishes