by diabolusdxm » September 3rd, 2013, 2:01 am
I wanted the exact same thing. I was afraid of accepting myself and wanted someone to help me get there like a domme. At least you're at the point where you can recognize you're truly trans. It can be really hard to take the next step. Hormones work wonders, both on feminizing our bodies and easing our minds from the burden of gender dysphoria. When I first went on hormones, the moment was magical. I took my first dose in the evening, and woke up feeling more calm and peaceful than I ever remember feeling before in my life. That really helped ease my mind that I was making the right decision.
Even if you're afraid, look for getting on hormones as a goal. The sooner, the better. You don't have to start living as a woman as soon as you start taking them, you can take months to prepare and feel more comfortable. I went 3 months, I know some people who waited a year before they "made the switch."
My best advice would be to look for a gender therapist. Don't go to just any therapist. If there's a local TG community that's pretty decent in your area, see if they would recommend any therapists. Maybe an online search for therapists that specialize in gender issues would work. In a big city, you can probably find a therapist who has lots of experience with transwomen.
The big kicker is that if you have insurance that covers therapy for depression, many gender therapists will bill your insurance for depression ICD codes instead of transsexualism codes. This eliminates risk of your coverage being discriminated against. It's an accepted practice, so you can go as far as to directly ask a therapist if they would be willing to bill gender therapy sessions as help for depression. I can't tell you how much the therapy helped me. I only went because I wanted a letter saying I could get hormones, and I found it to be incredibly helpful toward my life in general.
However you move forward with the realization. I wish you the best! It's a scary road ahead, but stay the course! A new life awaits you and it's absolutely worth the effort! YOU CAN DO THIS!
Welcome to the sisterhood!