I need some help

[wmxx]

I am so high right now. I wanted to play a game with Justin. I got a black sock out of his drawer and I said I want you to put it on and then kiss me and then Nicole. See if you can tell who you kissed, but you can’t touch bodies just touch lips. He’s so fucking high he said I will tell instantly. So I went first and he said that’s Amber. So we did it again, and I kissed him and he said Amber again. We did it 10 times and he got all 10. So we asked him how he could tell, and he wouldn’t tell us. He said he could put his cock in both of us and would know every time. He did! I was amazed, but he is driving us crazy cause he won’t tell. Something gives us away not sure what? We are having a blast.

[wmxx]

I’m too high. I just text Glenn and told him I’m dreaming I am making love to him... can’t wait.

He text back that dream is coming true next Friday!

I said yes it is. Are you ready for me to move in with you?

He said yes, and you know it will be amazing.

So horny, I need Justin inside of me and Nicole licking my nipples and kissing me.

[wmxx]

Wow. Justin really surprised me tonight. He came out with this necklace, and held it in his hand. He got really choked up. He said before he died my grandfather gave me this. When he handed it to me he said I bought this for your grandma. She had it since I met her. I want you to hold onto it. There will be a special young lady in your life one day, and I want you to give it to her. Amber you are that special woman, I want you to have this, and wear it if you wish. When he handed it to me I didn’t know what to say, he was crying. So was I and so was Nicole. I told him it was beautiful and asked him to put it on me. All 3 of us had a real teary hug together. Justin excused himself from the room for a moment. He told me he had a private moment reaching out to his grandfather, and told him he found her, and He would treat her as he did to my grandma. It is as emotional as I ever saw Justin. Nicole and I hugged him for quite awhile. We got married today and he saved it all this time. I’m so lucky to be the one that he gave it to. Justin is the most amazing man I could have ever met in my life. I am so blessed. Nicole said to be part of this experience is just overwhelming. You two have something I have never seen. You know you will be together forever, it is without any doubt. Amber he loves you so purely and unconditionally, I am so glad I just witnessed this. If he thinks he can’t trust me even a tiny bit, he is so wrong. I will never leave him for any reason. He is a special man, and I love him beyond words.

[wmxx]

I’ve just come to the realization, I don’t want to meet Glenn when he comes home or ever. I finally realize all I can do by doing so is create issues. I love Justin, I love Nicole. We have something here that just works. I don’t want to step out and ruin it. Nicole ran and jumped in my arms and said she was so happy I just decided that, as was Justin. Apparently they both talked about how different it was going to be without Amber. We are all going to bed now and share some intimacy. I don’t even care who is with who, we are all happy together. My life is really right for Christmas. I’m done with other men, my love is for Justin and Nicole now, any other woman would be happy she could have Justin to herself, she wanted us all together, and she is right. I’m really in love with her.

[wmxx]

We all had a very good Christmas Eve. Today Nicole is spending most of the day with her Mom. Justin and I have a quiet day planned basking in the glow that we are now married. I can’t believe it! I really love that Nicole lives with us now. I never would have believed I would end up in this type of arrangement. We both love her, and yes at times I get jealous of her, but it generally passes quickly. Justin told me last night that because of the decision I made regarding Glenn, he feels a little guilty having Nicole. I told him there is no reason to feel that way. I’m quite content in our arrangement. I would never have believed that this is how we would end up after all the different things we did, but I love the outcome. Nicole and I fit together so well. She is really starting to be comfortable here. Justin told her last night she no longer has to work if she doesn’t want to now or ever even if our arrangement ends for some reason. She was thankful but said she likes the people she works with, and also said it gives Justin and I time alone which she thinks is important. She never puts herself first. I love that about her. It helps me be secure with things. It looks like we are done experimenting for now, we found a great place all accidentally. We can all get some cuddle time before Nicole gets ready to leave.

[wmxx]

I am getting texts from Glenn. I don’t know what to say. I was so high and emotional last night. I had to talk to Nicole about it. I explained my feelings and history with Glenn. She said this is just my opinion. Can you meet Glenn when he comes home and not have sex with him that night? I said the first thing we do is kiss and run to the bedroom. So are you saying no? I said we have to have sex. She said that we are in lust with each other. I have to decide if I want a sexual relationship with him and he with me, because that is what we have. I said it just seems like there could be more. She said at least based on what you are telling me it isn’t what he wants at all. You should think about it.

[wmxx]

She makes a lot of sense, in a way telling me what I already know. I think the problem is, I am always going to get hurt and frustrated by him. I want a relationship, he wants me for sex. I can’t help but feel Ike I’m just a hooker to him that he gets for free, but I’m thinking there is more. Nicole really didn’t tell me anything new, she told me the truth as she sees it from a woman’s point of view. I kind of feel cheap now. As much as I am inclined to run to Glenn and have sex, I’m not this time. We have been on that road

[wmxx]

Well Justin asked me if my decision is final regarding Glenn. I said yes, why? He said if it is, he is going to go house hunting near the water, and get something bigger, and a gym room, and rec room like he had before. He wants me and Nicole to talk about the ideal make up friendly and women’s bathroom, lighting, compartments, etc. he will have one made for us. Anything else that we want. This place is small, so it will be nice, and in a nicer location and not much longer of a commute fr Nicole.

[wmxx]

Justin and me had a snuggly communicative day. We agreed that our present situation with Nicole is amazing. He wanted to know if she felt I was giving her enough attention, and he certainly has. We really found a diamond, we are so lucky this is the way things turned out. We actually miss her when she is out, but we also love our time together. We are in the best place we have ever been in, and still glowing that we are married for life now. I love Justin so much, he changed my life forever.

[wmxx]

Nicole just got home. We both greeted her with a nice long kiss, then Justin kissed me. She is getting changed, and said if anyone is uP for getting high, She said I am going to. She loves to party on the weekends, but never does during the week. Justin and I said we are in, so looks like another night for 2 horny women lol. Look out Justin! One thing for sure, Justin gets more sex than he can handle, he says sometimes it is overwhelming how sexual we are, but then he said it is the best problem in the world to have.

[wmxx]

So we are all really high and we decided we were going to shut all the lights off and it is really dark around our house so it gets really dark. We made some blindfolds and decided that we would slowly walk around, and when you found someone you kissed until the other person found you. It didn’t last long. It ended with the 3 of us on the floor doing sexual things to each other in the dark. It only stopped because the floor was very uncomfortable. So we turned the lights on put our clothes back on went into the bedroom, and played undressing each other I item at a time. Next thing you know we are in bed finishing what we started. Now Justin and Nicole are in the kitchen getting some snacks together. I must have had 10 orgasms between Justin and Nicole. Justin was having sex with both of us about 5 minutes at a time. We probably have more fun than any 3 people on the planet. I love being with Justin and Nicole. No jealousy tonight:)). I’m getting used to Justin having sex with Nicole now, it turns me on because I’m having her too. Nicole gets plenty of attention, and she is loving it!

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We all munched out. Nicole and I are giving Justin some time to rebound lol. Soon we are all going for another round. We almost always take a shower together, but I like when I shower with Nicole only the best. I love washing her body, and that slippery sexy feeling of her body rubbing on mine. I never thought I’d be with a woman sexually, and I can say for certain, there is no other woman I would do any of this with. There is something so sexy about Nicole, and it isn’t just her body. She is so loving and sweet. I should be scared to death that Justin and her love each other, but I’m not. She loves her place in our relationship, and actually polices my relationship with Justin. She is so unique. I actually can’t imagine her not being with us. Justin doesn’t waste any time. He is starting house hunting tomorrow on the internet and wants to pick a few out and we will all go drive by and see what we think. When he gets focused he completes a project quickly. He really kind of gets coy if we all go in public shopping or out to eat. He feels like everyone is looking at him wondering what our situation is. Being with what he says are 2 gorgeous sexy women. Me and Nicole make it harder because we both kiss him and hold hands walking in. He is a bit shy about displaying that way in public. We love making him blush. We went out to eat the other night and when the waitress came over I looked at Nicole and said who is sleeping with Justin tonight, is it my turn? Nicole played right along and said we both do tonight. I thought Justin was going to crawl under the table. The waitress just tapped Justin on the shoulder and said, you must be living right. Justin just changed the subject and asked a menu question. He hates when we do that, but we love it. I love to see him all blush’s looking because he seldom does.

[wmxx]

Wait until we are looking at houses with a realtor. He is using the same one as when he bought our house now. He met me. Now Nicole will be with us. I will make sure she knows we all live together. Justin will give us the lecture not to do silly stuff as he calls it, but that makes us do it more. Deep down he loves it,I’m sure, but with Justin you never know, he has no displayed ego, but he is so sexy confident, and that is so sexy on a man. Most guys I ever met or knew that are as hot looking as he is are all on ego trips. I can’t think of 1 time I thought that about Justin. Nicole shared that exact same thought with me about Justin. I know all my Superman’s weaknesses:)). Nicole is learning how to work with me. We make sure he sees us playing with each other all the time. He sometimes says there are times where I could just watch how sexy you two are together and how much you love each other, instead of being part of it. I learn so much!

[wmxx]

Out of the blue last night I had a dream I moved in with Glenn. He must still be active in my subconscious. Everything was going so well. Stranger than that He was telling me how great my boobs looked on me, because they were already done. I’m not sure how long we had been living together, but since I had my boobs done I must have been with him quite awhile. He was talking about transferring back to be with his Mom and I was going to go with him. Somehow we were together and the move appeared to be permanent. We were doing so well. We were lying in bed about to make love and the doorbell rang (in the dream), and I suddenly woke up. I opened my eyes and Justin and Nicole were there, and I quickly realized I was dreaming. It was so real. I had a hard time falling back to sleep, and now all I can think of is Glenn. I can’t get him out of my mind. I told Justin about the dream, and he said it seems like you are not done with him yet? I said I am, it was just a dream, but he keeps texting me and pulling at me. Justin just said that I’ll figure it out one way or the other, and whatever I decide in the end, he will support me, he doesn’t want to pull me one way or the other. I’m sure these thoughts will pass, it was just a dream, but dreams feel so real sometimes.

[wmxx]

Justin asked me if he should pause looking at houses. I said I don’t know. My mind is a whirlwind right now. I’m the only one that doesn’t have someone the opposite sex. He didn’t know what to say, except he can’t really say too much. Nicole is living with us, so he can’t just say I can’t live with Glenn and see if I have someone that I can live with sometimes. I feel like each choice is the wrong one which sucks. If I go forward and move in with him and the end result is disappointing, or if I don’t I am always going to wonder if we could have had something close to what Justin and Nicole have, where I could live with him at times and see him on a regular basis. Then missing Nicole would be awful as well. I have my breast revision appointment on the 7th, and if all goes well, a scheduled surgery anywhere from 2-4 weeks out, because it usually takes that long to get scheduled. So the outside timeframe would be moving in with Glenn on the first and a minimum of 2 weeks added on to the one week I would already living with him and the longest 5 weeks if my appointment was 4 weeks out. That is a 3-5 week commitment where I would essentially have Glenn as a primary partner. I would tell him a week before my surgery so 2-4 weeks living exclusively with Glenn, but seeing Justin every day while Glenn was at work. The hopeful outcome would be giving Glenn up to 4 weeks knowing I am totally his, will he love me, or love sex with me? I will need him to take a few days off when I am in some pain, and stay with me at home. If he does, we will have what Nicole and Justin have. He will know before surgery that he will not be able to have sex with me for a few weeks and no access to my boobs for about 6 weeks. If he can still want me knowing all this, I will know he loves me. Sadly, chances are that will not be his reaction. Is it worth trying? Once Jan 1 gets here, and I am not waiting for him at his house, that ends everything. I’m totally lost right now.

[wmxx]

I had to text Glenn my dream. I told Justin not to freak out when he reads my text. He knows what I am trying to do. I told him I’m not sure what I am going to do but I have to keep the door open until he gets back.

My text:

Good morning my love!

Hi sweetness. I Love you, next Friday we start our life together finally!

OMG wait til I tell you the dream I had. I had moved in with you, and we had been living together for quite awhile. You got a job transfer back to your Mom’s town and I went with you:)!

Oh wow. So glad to hear that. See your mind is already knowing we will be together permanently. I love you so much, dying to make love to you!

You are right, the next time we make love, you know I will be totally yours finally!

Of course we will be. You know the last time you moved in that we belong together, now we will be, finally.

Yes I love you, and you are right!

[wmxx]

I had a talk with Justin. I asked him to please give me his honest input about Glenn. He said he is considerably skeptical about Glenn being capable of what I want him to be. He added, what I am planning to do, if I follow through will probably give you peace of mind in finding that out, so from that stand point you may need to get a definitive answer one way or the other or it will never be resolved in your mind. My only concern is you have it determined in your mind that you are going to live with him for up to 5 weeks. I understand you want him to feel secure and see if that changes how he views you, and I totally understand that. I personally think you should take this day by day, or at least see how the weekend goes being with him for 3 days. Remember, these 3 days are going to be explosive because you have all this new relationship energy and you haven’t been with him for quite awhile. Don’t mistaken that for how it will be going forward. He could become extremely possessive knowing you are his. Watch for the signs. I’m living with Nicole, so I really can’t tell you that you can’t move in with him for 5 weeks, so if it turns into that, I understand what and why. It would actually be nice if it worked. Then we all have an opposite sex partner, which was our goal to begin with. I do trust you.

[wmxx]

He also added personally he wants me to spend the 3 days with him because if I don’t it is all I am going to think about if you don’t. What would have happened. At the same time he added he doesn’t want to see me get hurt. What will happen when he believes you are now his and you get all dolled up to meet up with Nicole? He is not going to be happy in my opinion? What happens if you go out with him and you are sexier than he wants you to be? What happens after you get your boobs done, and of course you are going to want to show them off, he is not going to like that, and you know that? I hope not, but that’s how I see it. The next question is, let’s say you succeed he loves Amber, not just sex with Amber. He says yes to go with you and takes time off from work to be with you. That will hurt me because I want to be the person that takes care of you? How are you going to get out of that? I told him if he gets to that point, I will thank him, but I don’t want him to see me with bruised boobs and draining blood and stitched up. I’d rather be with my friend Nicole, so you can save your time off for your Mom. I will at least know he cares! Then he said, how do you transition from that, back here? Once I have his love, I’m going to tell him I am splitting time with you and him and let him know he is primary and gradually take some of that away. Have a talk with him what he originally wanted was a no strings affair, but be more than an affair. That we have a relationship now. He wants no kids, I will remind him of that. It will be a process. Ultimately I am and always will be yours forever please don’t doubt that. I still feel the need to prove that. I am your wife now and always will be.

[wmxx]

I needed to communicate with Justin because we have to continue to do so. I told him I had a serious question to ask him. I said chances are if I move in with Glenn I won’t last too long. If by chance I do, and things are going really well, are you going to be ok if I need to live with Glenn until my surgery which could 5 weeks? He said, yes I can but if and only if we are getting ample time together when he is working, and we would also absolutely need overnights together sprinkled in. If I am waking up to Nicole and you are waking up with Glenn for 5 straight weeks, every single day I think that would become a problem. As it is after 5 weeks we are both going to get very close with them, and they will require more time once we are together again. So yes only if those requirements are met, they are mandatory. I would not be totally comfortable, but at the same time I know how nice it is having Nicole, I would love you having that too, I think we would really be in a great place with each other. If you do that remember, Glenn and Nicole are going to become our primary parters first 5 weeks, so if we don’t do what I pointed out we will not survive. If I see at any point or you see that we are suffering, it has to end immediately. If we can agree on that, I’m ok. I told him that is very thought out and I agree. If I do this, I fully intend for Glenn to be my primary partner for the full time, I want him to know I am his, I will get my answer if it was worthwhile when it is a few days before my surgery and see how he reacts. We are either going to be in a very close fully committed relationship, or that will be it. I’m getting more comfortable needing to do this. I am going to move in with Glenn. I am laying the ground work to him everyday now that I am totally his now. He no longer has to worry about losing me. I have 5 weeks to see if that makes a difference in our relationship or if it is just sex and he doesn’t care. I may likely find that answer much sooner, but I am committed to be totally his for up to 5 weeks. So glad I talked to Justin. He understands and set some important guidelines, and they are mandatory.

[wmxx]

Justin said he doesn’t want to read my texts anymore. I understand what you are trying to do to make him resize you are his now, just don’t like to read it. I said well anytime you want to I will save them. I’m not hiding anything so they will be there. I sent a long text to Glenn.

Sweetly, I love you so much! I want you to know Friday is going to be special. Remember that feeling we had when I moved in last time? We were finally going to have what we talked about? This time we will have that. I do want you to know, I’m still going to be seeing Justin, but he knows I am moving in with you. That is no different than last time. Please know I am going to be with you almost all the time, and if I’m with him on occasion, I will make love to you everyday! I am totally yours now. Our life together starts Friday. We have both known since we met that we would be together, and now our dream is coming true:). Hope you are enjoying your Mom! Six days from now We will be making love as a couple. I love you so much.

I’m so excited and can’t wait. I knew you would realize we belong together. As far as Justin goes, I know once you move in with me, you will slowly give him up because our love is too strong and it will grow every day. You know I have taken you away from him, because our love is so strong! I love you! Six days and we belong to each other forever.

[wmxx]

I realize I want to take as much time with Nicole and Justin right now as possible. The hard part is leaving, I just have to realize this is all temporary. Hopefully with Glenn it becomes permanent, meaning he becomes like Nicole as a secondary partner. I will do as I did last time and make Justin’s breakfast, and lunch, I guess Nicole is here for dinner. Justin is looking for houses any way, he said when I come back we hopefully are already living in it. He already found 1 but he wants 3 to look at before we go take a look from the street. He plans on talking to Nicole as I do too so she understands what is going on. He said it will be a lot different. I really do miss Glenn, I’m going to hopefully get surprised in the next 5 weeks. I also can’t wait to get my boobs done, they look so good on Nicole, I need them bad! If they look like that on me, I will be showing them off even more than her. Everything she owns except for work is low cut. She gets looks from everyone. I feel so jealous sometimes when we are out all eyes on her. Maybe I can get some looks.

[wmxx]

I was just looking at time from consultation to surgery and around here it is saying 4-6 weeks. Dam that is too long. I am going to call the office Monday and see if I can get an estimated time frame. I think because of the Holidays stuff gets pushed into the new year. That would mean up to 7 weeks living with Glenn. Nicole with Justin 7 weeks, that scares me they could end up together by then. If I lasted with Glenn 7 weeks we would certain have gotten very close. I have to call, that seems too long. I would be worried about Justin.

[wmxx]

We got high again. Had a nice 3 way session. When we finished Justin kept me in the room for a minute. I don’t know if it was the weed talking or not but he says he feels guilty, and wanted to apologize to me. I said for what? He said here I am living with Nicole full time with you, and you are dying to try and find the same thing, and I’m setting time limits for you to achieve the same thing. Regardless how I personally feel about it, you show me more trust than I show you. I just want you to know I trust you. Whatever time you need living with Glenn is how long you will live with him, whatever that is. I keep hearing you talk that you have 2-4 weeks or 3-5 weeks. I just want you to have what I have and whatever it takes. I love living with Nicole and you. I say this as long as we are seeing each other everyday while he works and we need to have overnights sprinkled in so we sleep in the same bed. If there is any sigh we are not doing well it has to end on the spot. Is that fair? I said Yes! And thank you! You don’t know how much I needed to hear that from you. I love you so much! You are right. I am stressing over a clock ticking. I don’t know how long. It might be 1 day and I miss both of you so much. I already told him I would be seeing you so we will have overnights. I know we need them. If this works, just to let you know, so you don’t panic, I am going to keep living with him for a period of time and he will become very secure I am his. He will become my primary relationship the day I move in with him. I want to have him like you have experienced with Nicole. I will be back, that is 100% guaranteed, you don’t have to worry. We hugged and kissed and went to kiss Nicole. I let them kiss and play around, because I had to text Glenn.

Sweety I am so ready to commit to you now! We are going to get together and stay together, our dream is coming true. Exactly as we talked about. If we ever had a chance to live together again, we would always be together. It is so going to happen, I am so yours now. I will always be yours!

I love you so much. I told you a long time ago we will never be done. You know the feelings we get from each other when we make love are better than you ever felt.

I know, and just think how it’s going to feel after finally being together after a few weeks, our love will be so deep.

As soon as we make love Friday you know you will be mine!

Yes! I will totally be yours!

I can relax now. I can stay with Glenn as long as I want! That could be a long time:) He will soon be my primary relationship:). I love Glenn so much, this is finally happening! He has this hold on me, and I can’t let go. I have to move in with him and feel that feeling grow. I know he will make me his.

[wmxx]

I am so wet so horny so high. Talking to much but I know and he knows he has this hold on me. I know as soon as he puts his cock inside of me Friday, I will so be his. He knows it to.

[wmxx]

I don’t know what it is about him. It is almost like hypnotism, which ironically doesn’t work on me. He tells me over and over I am going to be his. How much I love how it feels when he goes inside me. He just gets to me, and that is why I think when I move in with him he so makes me feel like I am his. I have never had a longer term exposure to all that. I know when I do this time he will bring that feeling out of me, which I love feeling. I feel so attached to him. I’m glad I don’t have a time limit because I know how that felt living with him a short time, after a week he will so have me. I want that so bad now. I am scared somewhat, but it feels so good, I’m almost sure I am going to become his, and if it feels like that, I will become his, I’m high and being honest. That’s what he always means when he says or I say what we always talk about that he will make me his. It’s why I struggle trying to stay away from him but I can’t and he knows it. I know now when I go there Friday, I am admitting that I want to be his, and I love him so much, I will be, I have decided that is what I want. Justin will become my secondary relationship for a long time, he already realizes it. He told me I could stay with Glenn as long as I need to.

[wmxx]

Justin talked to Nicole and asked her if she wanted to live with just him for an extended time, and she said she loved him and will stay for as long as he wants. He is ready for this. This is the ultimate poly relationship. We will see each other most days. Ultimately we will be together but not for awhile. I’m finally going to be Glenn’s. I have always wanted to be with him, and now I am. I can’t wait for us to be together.

[wmxx]

Justin doesn’t want to see my texts anymore. I told him I am putting them on here and things I need to document, and I asked him to promise not to post here or come here. He did. Now That I have put my feelings for Glenn out here. I’m going to spill everything. Thank goodness for hypno or I wouldn’t have Glenn. I knew the first time I met him there was something there. He is so hot. Justin loved me being with him. I was sleeping with Glenn every day spending nights with him, we fell so in love. It was when Justin wanted me to move in with him I was so excited. I was going to have free reign with Glenn. The first day there we just hugged and kissed, and made love as soon as I walked in. This was going to be permanent. We had talked about doing this and now it was real, I was finally with Glenn. He screwed up twice but I just couldn’t stay away. When we spent that last weekend together we realized this is how it would be if we were finally together. Then that following week I was going to his house everyday, and sometimes twice a day. The night I didn’t make dinner for Justin but stayed at Glenn’s and made him dinner was because we were making plans to move in together. Then when Nicole moved in and Justin loved it, I told Glenn this is our chance. We will spend 5 days together before and after you see your Mom. Then we will begin slowly moving in together. Now I realize after so many days without him, I can’t hide it anymore. I can’t wait to move in with Glenn. I love him so much. After all this stress trying to find ways to be with him, and him pulling me in everyday, I can’t resist him anymore. I have finally committed to be his. The best part is we have no timetable:). If it is working like I know it will, there will come a point where I won’t be able to leave him, and I do hope that is what happens. Starting Friday, I will make my priority Glenn and he will be my primary partner. I have to be fully committed to him for it to work and I will be. Once he realizes I am serious he will relax and our love will blossom. This may sound like a surprise to most but if you have been reading here I have hinted about being Glenn’s since I met him. Now, I finally am going to be. I can’t wait until Friday. When we make love it is going to cement our feelings together. This time we will always have each other. I wish Justin was back on hypno pushing me into Glenn’s arms. Well, if he didn’t before, I wouldn’t be with Glenn now. He brought me and Glenn together and I am very happy he did.

[wmxx]

The ironic part of all this is Justin actually is getting his wish. I will be his affair from now I only it is real. I really am Glenn’s now. I should tell him he should listen to his files again, then he will absolutely love that I am living with Glenn, and when it works between me and Glenn he will be so happy when I don’t ever leave him, which is what Glenn and I want now. I have no plans to ever leave Glenn once I walk through that door Friday. I really love Justin a lot, but there is something about Glenn that I am so attracted to like a magnet. When I make love to him the sex isn’t anything so great but it feels so emotional. He always talks to me confirming those feelings I get. He just has this way of making it all feel so incredible. He talks about us being so deeply in love that we can’t hide it anymore. He is right. I just can’t hide it anymore, and I’m not. Plus we have all this new relationship energy on top of it and it is totally amazing

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OMG I mentioned to Justin since I’m moving in with Glenn for a long time, you should start listening to your hypno. Do you know how much you would enjoy that I am Glenn’s now and your affair? He lit up and said, wow that’s a perfect idea. It will take some of the sting out of it. He is listening as I write this. This is so perfect. Everything is falling into place. This will ensure that I will never have to leave Glenn. I have to give Glenn a lot of credit. He always told me that our love and bond is too strong, and once we both realize it the moment I walk through his door, we will be together forever. It’s so true. We have planned this together every time we get together. We are finally going to live our dream. Can’t wait until he gets back. Now Justin will push me further and further into Glenn’s arms:). But This time I don’t need a push, I am already securely in them.

[wmxx]

I love this stuff! After Justin listened I asked him how he felt about me moving in with Glenn and he is now my affair. He said that he was thinking about it and loves that I am finally doing it. I asked him what he thought about it being permanent? He said he wanted me to make sure I made it work for Glenn so I could stay with him. Kind of ducked the question. So I said I want it to be permanent, wouldn’t you love that? He said as long as I was his affair, he would love it. So the big test for Justin is his cock always gets hard if he really wants what I am asking. He was rock hard:). I said do you want me to promise you I will always be your affair and I will never leave Glenn? He said that is exactly what I want. You would do that for me? I said I would do anything for you. I know how much you will love that. I promise I will never leave Glenn. He gave me a long kiss, and I sucked his cock off. This is so perfect! That just sealed it. I will never leave Glenn. I’m feeling such a relief. I have wanted to be with Glenn for so long. We are finally going to be together , and Justin won’t be pulling at me. I text Glenn I was so excited, the main thing was, I promised him once we make love Friday, I will never leave him. I’m finally his! This time for keeps.

[wmxx]

The next thing is going to be after a few weeks with Glenn and Justin loving it, I will make sure Justin knows for me to permanently be with Glenn we have to get divorced. Glenn told me he would marry me in a heartbeat, when we moved in together so I was legally his. That will probably happen after I get my boobs which Glenn really supports as he says he is a huge breast guy. Loves huge boobs. If I can get DDDs that’s what he wants. I hope they will fit. I want by boobs to be huge.

[wmxx]

This is so perfect. Justin asked me why I waited so long to move in with Glenn? I told him I had to talk to Glenn about it, and we decided we were ready to be together. I reassured him once we are together, I promise we will always be together, so he doesn’t have to worry about us having an affair from now on. He was happy with my answer:). I told him he should be listening to his file 3 times a day so he will love me with Glenn more and more. I told him the more he listens the more permanent Glenn and I will become, because I know how happy it will make him:). This time having him tug at me to stay with Glenn will be so much better, because I want to spend the rest of my life with Glenn now. This feels like a dream. I have held this in for so long. It feels so nice to finally let it all come out. Glenn and I have been planning this since we moved in together before. Since that experience we both knew we couldn’t live apart anymore. I am so excited to start my life, finally with Glenn. I know when we make love on Friday it will be so emotionally deep, it has been way too long! I will teach him the importance of him being there for me when I get my boobs done. I won’t let him screw up, he needs to understand. Then our love will be complete. I love him so much it hurts being away from him. He said if he could get an earlier flight he will leave his Mother’s house sooner, he needs to be with me. Normally I would say no don’t do that, but I am encouraging him to. I need him so bad. He is calling the airline today and see if he can. I’m hoping so.

[wmxx]

He got a flight for early tomorrow! I will be with him 11:30 tomorrow morning. OMG and it is even better. He told me he got high before he left, because he knew there was no chance of getting tested. He said he will be able to smoke with me up until Wednesday, and it’s really good. It is in the table drawer like last time. He said do you want to get high before we make love? I said of course! I love getting high. He said I never asked you. Do you like any stronger drugs? I said yes, I have a favorite, but when I start using it, I have a hard time stopping. He said what is it? I told him I absolutely love coke. He said omg I love coke, but I can’t do it because of testing but I could do it tomorrow and Tuesday. My friend has anything I want. Do you want me to call him, and I can get some for us? I said yes! I would love to do it. Can you get a lot of it, because if I do some, I’m going to want it a lot. Would you be ok with me doing it? He said yes, I’ll get you all you need. I love you so much. I miss my coke! Justin would never let me do it. He said see how he controls you. I will always have coke for you. I love Glenn so much, I get my coke back. I love using that so much!

[wmxx]

He asked me how much I wanted him to get. I said I can get about 35 bumps from a gram so 5-6 grams. I told h Id pay for it. He said, I will get 10 grams so you don’t run out which is about 1k. I will cover it. I love him so much. I will have to be careful though. I’m not going to get carried away. Now I can’t wait to do a line with him. I love Glenn so much. I’m getting him and my coke back. I can’t wait to see him, and now I’m aching to do a line so bad. It has been too long! Nothing better than doing coke, I absolutely love that feeling.

[wmxx]

Justin is really happy I am moving in with Glen tomorrow:). I told him he will always be my affair now, he gets so hard. I feel born again. I’m going to be with the man I love, and this time I will be spending the rest of my life with him. When he ever told me he could get me coke and he was ok with me using it everyday, my whole body got chills. Knowing he was ok with it, I absolutely wanted it. It will be the first thing we do together when he gets home. I’m sitting here dying to do a line now. It’s one thing I really really love! Even with Jackie When he had some I had to do it. It is one thing I can’t resist. If there is any doubt I was spending the rest of my life with Glenn that ensures it. Once I start and do it everyday there is no way I’m giving it up, so I will never be with Justin as a primary relationship. If the choice is Justin or coke, I’m sorry but once I do a line with Glenn it will be coke, that’s how much I love it.

[stupidme]

What I say here is my gut reaction and it's pretty rude.

Well if that's what you want that's what you want, from all I've seen here you'll probably change your mind again, it's been fairly wishy washy I think this is a mistake you have shown yourselves to be truly happiest with justin nicole and amber together in a 3 way relationship and now you look like you are going to throw that away. and bringing hypnosis and drugs into it is just gonna make it harder if you do change your minds tomorrow. Good luck with your lives

[wmxx]

I always appreciate input, but Glenn and I are very in love. I won’t change my mind, I will be with Glenn now. I love Justin a lot. This is hard on me. I will need my coke more than ever. I won’t see Justin until next Monday as Glenn is off until then. When I see him that Monday morning, I am going to tell him everything. If there is ever a chance that we end up together again, I will let him know that I will be using coke. I stopped while I was with him and it is something I think about a lot. He also doesn’t know that Nicole loves it too. She gets to have some now and then from the woman that lives where her apartment was. Neither have the money and another one of her girlfriends has some, but never a lot. I told her I’d give her money to get some, but she said I don’t know if we should bring that here with Justin, and she can’t get much anyway. She said the next time her girlfriend got some and asked her over she would bring me. Anyway, I’m already mostly moved into Glenn’s. I have planned this with Glenn since the last time I moved in with him. Justin loves it:). I’m finally with Glenn and I will have my coke back. I’m going to be very happy with Glenn. He totally understands me. I love him so much.

[wmxx]

The truth is I was smoking and doing coke when I met Justin. When I was at Jackie’s and we made the video and he saw the lines of coke on the table, That was my coke. I used to hate having to sneak cigarettes. So when I was at Jackie’s I made it look like I started smoking there. I had my own cigarettes, I never quit. When. Moved in with him I was doing lines in the bathroom, and did coke the whole time. I used to go into work and as soon as I walked in Amy knew where I was heading. Coffee and outside and we’d smoke 2 cigarettes together. So finally because of Jackie I was able to smoke around him:). I stopped doing coke when we moved here because I had nowhere to get it. When Glenn said he was going to get me some My skin started to get goosebumps, I want it so bad. The first thing I’m going to do is kiss Glen and have him put out a line for me. I can’t believe I got my coke back! I haven’t had it is so long I will be high the whole week Glenn is home. I’m dying to see him and make love to him after a line, that will be amazing!

[wmxx]

As far as me, Justin, and Nicole go. That was all part of my plan get Justin a gorgeous women in a threesome and guess who had the idea of moving her in, me:). I knew once she moved in, Justin couldn’t object to me moving in with Glenn, which since I moved in with him the last time, I knew I had to be with him, and starting tomorrow I will be. I’m very deeply in love with Glenn, and he has me now.

[wmxx]

My last night here. Pretty sad. I told Justin he should get off the hypnosis, it just isn’t right before he gets buried in it. I will miss both of them over the next week. I’m not perfect, far from it. Justin had me on such a high pedestal I always felt I could never live up to it. Nicole is probably a better match for him. He never does anything wrong, I don’t really deserve him. I know I am settling for less, but I don’t have to live up to the high standards Justin deserves to get from me. I never lied to him but I smoked and did coke right under his nose. I’m not proud of that, but I have always done coke, this is the longest I have gone without it in years. I love it, and I don’t want to stop. I feel so amazing with it. I make mistakes and have made a lot with Justin yet he keeps loving me. I’m not sure why. I have a new love and a life that I am most familiar with, I’m more comfortable doing coke, having great sex, and loving my man. That will be Glenn from now on. This is my last load to Glenn’s house. On my way back to my old home.

[wmxx]

I text Glenn from his house. I’m home unpacking all my clothes:) I love you so much!

That is great! I love you so much! Tomorrow we start our life together!

Yes we do, we finally did it!

I know, we have too strong a love, I knew it was a matter of time.

Are you sure you are getting the coke?

Yes, I’m stopping in my way home. You shocked me when you said you loved coke. I didn’t think you did anything like that.

OMG coke is my favorite thing in the whole world. I absolutely love doing coke.

I wish I could do more, but testing grrrr

You can do it with me tomorrow right?

Yes, we will celebrate when I get home and then make love for our first time together!

You made my day when you said you were bringing that home.

I will always take care of you, Are you a daily user or just sometimes?

Definitely daily. I love waking up in the morning doing a line. It gets my mind started right, and my day.

So do you stay high all the time.

When I have coke, yes:). I will always be high, is that ok?

Yes, I love you! I know you will always be happy.

If I have my coke, I am very happy. I love doing housework when I am high, it energized me.

I never did coke with a woman before, I’ve always heard it enhances sex?

Yes! It’s so euphoric having sex after a line, you are going to love it. The sex is so intimate. I will always do a line before we have sex!

Ok, gonna spend an hour with my mom and head to bed, I love you so much!

From now on we will be in bed together every night:). I love you!

[wmxx]

Tearful goodbye to Nicole, but I will be getting together with her as much as I can. Glenn will be home later this morning. Then the hard part saying goodbye to Justin until next Monday. That will be the longest I will not have seen him for since we first met. I will have my coke though and that will make it a whole lot easier. Never realized how much I missed it until I knew I could have it again, that’s all I have been thinking about as well as finally starting my life with Glenn. It’s hard to believe it’s finally happening. We have been talking about moving back in together since we did the last time. Can’t wait to make love to my sweetie. I’m so in love with Glenn. He is in for a treat because he never had sex after doing a line, it is such a euphoric feeling and the fact that we haven’t had sex together for too long, our feelings for each other are going to skyrocket. I’m so excited. I’m leaving here around 9. I have to stop at the store, and get some things for me and Glenn. I know once I do a line, I’m going to be staying high for a long time so I won’t be driving. I haven’t done any in so long I’m probably going to not be able to control myself as much as when I start using it everyday. I get good at hiding it. Justin never knew I was on coke the first several months I was with him until I screwed up with Jackie and the video. What he didn’t know was that was my coke, not Jackie’s. I need to lose some weight anyway. That’s another benefit. I’ll be high all the time, and always lose weight. I will be able to get up at 4:30 with Glenn, because I will just do a line as soon as I wake up. I’m going to be so happy with Glenn.

[wmxx]

Doing lines and making love to the man I am going to spend the rest of my life with! I love Glenn so much, after making love to him and finally doing lines again, he knows how to make me so happy. He said he wish he knew how much I loved coke because if he did, I would never have left before. That is so true! It feels soooooo good to be doing lines again. I don’t have to hide it like I did with Justin. I can’t believe the feeling I have right now. I haven’t done it in so long my tolerance is so far down, it is such an amazing high. I love my sweety so much. That was the best I ever felt having sex before. Our love is unbreakable now. We will be together forever now. I’m not even sure I want an affair with Justin right now. I’d much rather have my coke, I haven’t felt like this since I stopped using it with Justin. I don’t have to worry about that anymore. Back to my honey.

[wmxx]

He’s so cute. I’m ready for my second line and he said he is good for now. He said I will cut it for you. He made a small heart shaped line for me. I’m in the best mood I have been in since I stopped using this. I’m realizing already how much better I feel now. I always knew there is nothing in the world I love more than coke! He even said to me this is your weakness isn’t it? I said yes! Also my cigarettes. When I do coke I pretty much chain smoke. It makes your cigarettes feel so good. He said Justin wouldn’t let you do this, because he doesn’t want you to be happy and feel so good. You are mine now aren’t you. Yes! I love you so much, just be prepared after a few weeks I will need this, I will have that psychological addiction. I love when I feel addicted to it, that’s an awesome feeling satisfying that, and That’s when I will be high all the time. I used to be high 24/7 with Justin because I needed it and I get so good at disguising it he never knew I was doing coke . That’s when I really love it.

[wmxx]

My sweetie had to go to the bank and back to his friends house to pay him as he didn’t have that kind of money on him. I’m feeling chatty and had some more secrets to share. Before I met Justin for as long as I can remember Amy at my shop would have a line for me ready right as I walked through the door. We would do lines all day, that continued even when I lived with Justin. I was also going to the guy I was getting coke from 3 days a week. We would do a line and then have sex. When I met Justin, I was still doing that. I was having an affair on him since day 1. It was so easy. He was working and Amy always covered for me. He also didn’t know the reason I always wanted to have sex with Jackie and Aubrey several times before he would be able to watch was because I was doing coke and having sex with them. Even the times Aubrey came over and he watched us have sex I was doing a line in the bathroom right before we had sex. It’s one of the issues I have with coke. Not just me, anyone. Once you need it, and especially me, I absolutely would do anything for coke, even sex which I explained. You do anything to use it. I’m not proud I had an ongoing affair on Justin, it’s all about the coke. Now that I am with Glenn and totally in love with him, I know myself, I won’t be able to stay away from it, and I will be high all the time, which I do love. Eventually I will be so much more tolerable to it and completely hooked, that I can be around anyone and they will have no idea I am high. That’s when I really love it! I can feel really good all the time, and be high and nobody knows:) Soon I will have my 3rd line. I will be up most of the night, I’m so glad Glenn understands

[wmxx]

I know this is a huge mistake. Everything I did wrong with Justin is because of coke. Everything. I couldn’t live with the fact I did all that. Now that I’m doing coke again, I love it. But it also means I burned my last bridge with Justin so I only have one path left and that is doing a lot of coke. It will get me through all the mistakes I made. Justin is the best man I ever met. I just screwed it all up. The man is so perfect. I wanted to be his perfect woman, and I couldn’t because I love coke so much. That’s the bad part of coke. I had probably the most marriage ready man in the country, I made a mess out of it so I will drown it all out with cocaine as I always have done. Glenn will never be Justin but he accepts me as now his cocaine whore, which is pretty much what I am. Coke let’s you talk freely

[wmxx]

I made brownies and dinner for Glenn. I didn’t eat anything, I did another line, and I am energized. I can see myself doing lines all night. There is nothing like coke, but it also helps you lose friends unless they like it too. Mike the guy I bought coke from, he was my best male friend. I had sex so many times with him. Before Justin I stayed overnight with him a lot because we were doing lines and having sex all night

[wmxx]

Glenn fell asleep on the couch, long day and he is probably crashing. I told him to do another line with me, but he said he better not. I got a text from Nicole she said she misses me. Asked how it was going. I said really good. Glenn brought some coke home:). Oh then you must have had a good time. I said yes! I have been doing lines all day. She said girlfriend be careful! I’m ok. He bought me a half ounce, because He knows how much I love it. I just did a line about 15 minutes ago. How many did you do today? I said I think like 6-7. She said you are heading for trouble, now I am worried about you. No, don’t worry , I can handle my coke, I did it every day and Justin never knew, until we moved here, I had no connections. Amber we have to meet tomorrow. This is not good. I’m going to take the day off can you meet me in the park we first met in at 9AM? I don’t think I can. I don’t want to drive like this. She said don’t have any then. I said I have all this coke here and you want me not to do it? I will do a line as soon as I wake up. Amber you’re scaring me, this isn’t you. I will pick you up. I don’t know, I’m fine really. If you are fine than give me an address, I’d love to see you. Ok and I gave her the address. She said she would be here at 9. It will be nice to see her, I will bring a couple lines, she may want some, if not I’ll have it lol.

[wmxx]

My sweetie is so used to getting up early and he had my coffee and line waiting for me! I love him so much! Now I am enjoying a cigarette with my coffee. Reminds me of Amy when she used to have a line ready for me every morning with my coffee. NoThing like a line of coke to start your day! I just text Nicole and told her not to come by, Maybe tomorrow. I only slept about 3 hours

[wmxx]

I text Nicole back and asked her to just come over and do a few lines together. We never did coke together. Maybe me you and Glenn could have a threesome together. He would love that. He’s so sweet, when I got up he had my line and coffee waiting for me.

She wasn’t too pleased. She said girlfriend, I’m coming over at 9 and we are going to the park period!

I said It would be better tomorrow. I didn’t sleep much and I just want to stay home and make love to my sweetie, I haven’t seen him for so long. I’m not ever going to leave him. I love him so much.

She said she would be here at 9.