I think I'm slowly healing. I think I could probably get a normal night's sleep now. But as sleeping with a file on seems to keep me from rolling over and hurting myself, I figured I'll keep doing it like this.
Since last time I listened, a nice person on IRC has helped me to test the effects of some of the files on this playlist. She guided me through triggering myself for 2 files (X Girl Time and Panty Wetting Princess) and asked some questions to see how much effect they were having on me.
X Girl Time didn't seem to do much when triggered, though I think I might not have enough experience interacting with girls to know how it'd feel to be one.
Princess was an interesting experience. On testing the trigger (trying on some cute panties) I was absolutely sure that the file wouldn't have any effect - quite a contrast to my normal curiosity. But it turned out that I was doing exactly what the file said, rationalising it as my own decisions.
Now, there's part of that file's description that bothers me - the urge/addiction to wearing panties all the time. Apart from that small part-suggestion, the file's effects are an interesting test of how far it can push me. But it seems I have some resistance; even though the rest of the file's effects get into my head very well, I don't feel any such urge. But, I'm happy to take advice, so excluded that file from my random playlist generator (as well as ChristmasSlave and all curse files).
Yesterday afternoon, I listened for an hour to a playlist consisting of Language Learning, Artists Resolve, Stop Procrastinating, just do something, all my induction/deepener files, and TrainSusceptible. Unfortunately, I don't remember to check which files the playlist actually selected (though I remember waking to an awakener in hellion0's voice).
In the evening, I hacked up the Princess file and cut out most of the undesirable suggestion - although its a very rough job, using Audacity on a PC with no soundcard. I figure that as the file gets me into trance so well, every listen will make it easier for me to accept other training. Is that logical?
And now, I just gave myself another random selection, this time excluding only the curses. The files chosen were:
- Accelerator (no wakeup)
- Deepener
- hellion0's Base Induction
- Baby Time Induction
- Simple Induction
- Artist's Resolve
- Focus Induction 2
- Awakener (well, that didn't work)
- X Girl Time (body)
- Panty Wetting Princess (rough edit)
- Story Time (body)
- Language Learning
- Over to Next File induction
- Email Slave
- Hellion0's Base Induction
- Reinforcer (body)
- Boyhood 2 (body)
- Just DO Something
- Confuse Induction (woke during the pre-file explanation)
So ... I'd much appreciate any suggestions on which triggers to test next, or how to test them, or any other files to download. I love to test my limits, so I'm happy to try anything as long as its not a permenant change.
And its 3:09am now, so unless IRC proves too much of a distraction, I'll probably give my brain another dose in a few minutes.