Well, I can remember the email I posted in my last journal now, and I feel so dumb that I forgot it so easily. I started up messenger, and waited a while, then got 2 freind requests exactly the same second. I said hi to both and asked if they know why the coincidence.

I'm pretty sure the email effected both, they could both of given me commands, but only one did as far as I noticed. I'm rushing to get this posted before I miss too much of my TV show, so I'll just post the logs instead of writing about it.

Equinox13, his status is Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a horrible crisp, which no decent human being would eat? 8:55 PM me: Not all bread is created equal ^_^ A setting that makes your toast inedible might actually make good toast if your bread starts fast-frozen

And hi BTW

8:56 PM equinox13: hello

^_^ yeah it's a quote that makes people think

so are you done with work for the day?

8:57 PM me: 2 new friends at once ... coincidents, or has my proxy been a bad boy blocking things?

equinox13: possibilities abound

8:58 PM me: So, do I know you from somewhere else? One of the anime forums or somewhere else?

equinox13: i just tried to add you to my friends list as soon as i found out your google account info

besides WMM?

me: Ah, its you

8:59 PM equinox13: not likely though i used to order a lot of anime...

equinox13

me: Didn't recognise the address until I read our message

equinox13: there you are ^_^

9:00 PM i think i accidentally erased your ability to see my email address in my first email to you...

me: Its not a big deal ^_^ I kind of realised

I normally can hit reply

but if that doesn't work I cant remember it later

9:01 PM equinox13: oh and i would pull your google account info out of that journal entry soon

don't want to start getting hypnofiles thre too

me: I dont check it

equinox13: so how are you feeling btw? happy i hope?

that's good then

me: I just made it because if you don't have a googlemail address, you cant save logs on here

9:02 PM equinox13: true that

me: Can you do group chat? I think I'm saying all the same thing to 2 people

9:03 PM equinox13: i think so...

me: I haven't used this thing much

equinox13: i haven't tried to do it in pidgin

so which of us did you get a request from first then?

9:04 PM me: Not sure, they both appeared at the same time

Thats why I wondered if they'd got stuck on the proxy

equinox13: so you're a bit confused about that then?

it would make sense

9:06 PM so about my last email i sent - i said it would be a 3 part set but i don't think i'll be able to finish it on the next one

is that ok?

me: OK

9:07 PM equinox13: have you been able to read it yet? do you feel the need to look in a mirror? ^_^

me: I don't think I read it yet, maybe once

9:08 PM but now if I dont have time I can mark it Unread until later

equinox13: that's good then

9:09 PM so what's up with that last suggestion you wrote about in your journal?

9:10 PM me: which one?

9:11 PM equinox13: actually... can you tell me the last one you remember? without looking?

me: Was a little girl one I think, last night

9:12 PM A bit younger than the previous ones

9:13 PM equinox13: do you still feel like a little girl?

me: No, that was last night

equinox13: ok

how about now then? like your normal self?

9:14 PM me: I think so

equinox13: sorry - if i'm too curious just let me know

9:15 PM i haven't gotten too much in the way of suggestions to work on myself so i have a bit of morbid curiosity about it

9:16 PM me: Hehe, your like Angel and Andrew, they're really curious about everything, always asking questions

equinox13: always more to learn and more to experience

me: that's why I got to include the emails in the journals

:D

equinox13: ^_^

me: Hey, thats Andrew's catchphrase, are you Andrew?

equinox13: no

9:17 PM if you want to know my real first name it's Chris

me: Hi Chris ^_^ I'm Jean

equinox13: but don't tell anyone ok?

me: Okies

equinox13: nice to finally meet you Jean

9:18 PM so before the emailslave files what kind of files did you listen to if any?

me: I never did any others

9:19 PM equinox13: none at all? not even a suggestibility one?

me: I did the emailslave thing with Andrew because I want to have other people controlling me sometimes, too

9:20 PM He gave me the hypnosis, and the safety, and said I could just listen to the CD when his not there, so it stays fresh

equinox13: indeed

9:21 PM me: I didn't know there's all these files until i foud the site

equinox13: you, my dear, are a paragon of human potential in so many ways

^_^

9:22 PM me: Dont you have to be lawful good for that?

equinox13: in some RPG rules

9:23 PM so you're a gamer too?

me: a bit

equinox13: ^_^ that's good to hear

women make good gamers yet so few want to because of the negative stigma

meow

9:24 PM so have you been getting a lot of emails lately?

9:25 PM me: quite a few

3 unread ones in my inbox now

9:26 PM I dont know if I read them or not yet though

equinox13: hopefully 1 is mine... if you don't remember a command to strip naked except for your glasses and study yourself in a mirror for an hour...

me: So your a gamer too? What do you play?

9:27 PM equinox13: lotro, D&D 3.5 in my own split-world setting, a couple other smaller things now and then

9:28 PM me: I used to like d&d but in 2nd ed, when I was at school, never really got into 3rd the same

equinox13: it changed a lot

3.5 really refreshed a lot though

me: picked up BESM and QAGS and stuff in the mien time

equinox13: 4.0 you might as well play WoW

me: and Exalted

equinox13: ooo

i love BESM

9:29 PM all my NPCs are from either that or slayers

me: Ever plaid BBSW?

equinox13: never played exalted though

BBSW?

9:30 PM me: Big Breast Small Waist, BESM addapted for urotsukidoji and that

equinox13: O.O

i MUST look that up now

9:31 PM me: Theres 2 versions online, one thats based off of BESM and one that isn't

because somebody threatened to sue them and got the first one taken down

equinox13: of course

9:32 PM do you have a site i could go to?

9:33 PM i think i found it...

sweet

9:34 PM may i ask who the other person you're talking to is?

me: deki889 it says ... Dave somebody

equinox13: interesting...

9:35 PM can i try something?

9:36 PM me: sure

equinox13: how do you feel righ tnow? as in an emotion?

9:38 PM me: Pretty stressed out, actually

equinox13: relax then

be happy

the day is over

me: got talking to the other guy about being used and stuff, got onto why I'm so nervous

9:39 PM equinox13: i remember that name from WMM

don't remember anything about him though

9:41 PM ^_^ would you be interested in having a tail and ears later?

phantom type of course

me: =^.^= That might be how i first got into this

equinox13: meow

me: Would be great

equinox13: i'll be sure to put an at work clause in then

9:43 PM me: Oh, I got another conversation :P

equinox13: another question - did you go to the restroom when you got home from work or did you get on the computer immediately?

me: Getting busy now

equinox13: lol popular today then

me: I cant really remember

9:45 PM equinox13: do you think you might need to then?

i know i always do when i get home...

and when i forget to..

9:46 PM me: Well, I had a coffee with tea

Will need to go soon

equinox13: soon?

me: yeah

9:47 PM equinox13: can you define soon?

me: I dunno, probably in the next hour or something

9:48 PM equinox13: that long huh?

9:49 PM when you've wet yourself on command - you had no control at all? you just went?

sorry - another curiosity thing

i can't imagine just wetting myself like that

me: Yeah ... a few different feelings

9:50 PM Well, maybe sooner

sometimes its like I've been told to do this, I have to do it, i don't have any choice

equinox13: if you need to go...

me: one guy told me to make the muscles relax, and I found they just wouldnt react when i try to hold it

9:51 PM then anothr time i was so disparate that I couldn't hold it

9:52 PM and the one where i didn't even notice it was happening until afterwards

9:53 PM hey, thats weird, you and Angel on the same frequency today, thinking about that thing *blushes*

equinox13: another thing that fascinates me is being able to get someone to forget something they should remember

^_^ indeed

me: He just came out and said "you really need to pee" and I said how do you know

equinox13: great minds think alike

we can feel it

in that we are similar

9:54 PM and you really do have to pee

me: I'm going to have to go in a bit, 10 or 15 minutes

equinox13: the question is when are you going to pee?

me: yeah I know

equinox13: you need to pee sooner than that it seems

9:55 PM me: yeah, getting pretty desprate now, can you tell me to do a wee please?

equinox13: go to the toilet Jean - go pee

9:56 PM me: ah, I think I misread

equinox13: you wet yourself?

me: i thought for a second I had to go right here

equinox13: did you?

me: yeah

9:57 PM equinox13: ^_^ you should rmember your last journal entry now

and unfortunately i need to get ready for work now...

me: Well, I remember now ^_^

equinox13: ^_^

9:58 PM me: See you around, mind if I post this chat?

equinox13: you may

me: Thankies ^_^

equinox13: have fun and get cleaned up soon

a pleasure always

me: Blushing like anything now, so embarrassed

9:59 PM equinox13: you should be - peeing in front of me like that...

me: Having to do its one thing, even having accidents, but asking for it ...

equinox13: ^_^

me: That's one tricky guy

equinox13: indeed - i need to study that email now

10:00 PM later then

8:55 PM deki889: Hi

8:56 PM me: Hi

I must be popular today, 2 new friends at the same time

Unless the proxys been blocking you or something

deki889: yeah, guessing from your post on warp my mind people added you

8:57 PM me: Ah, was wondering where you found me

deki889: yep

8:58 PM me: Ive not had anybody add me on here since I did the reset though

deki889: the reset?

8:59 PM me: listened to deprogram all file because somebody was pushing too hard

9:00 PM Had 3 people wanting to play on here every day before that giving me commands without asking if I was doing anything else

deki889: eww, that is not good

In the future you want me to use this E-mail or your werepuppy one?

9:01 PM me: I dont use this for email, but got to hav a googlemail address or you can't save logs

deki889: ahh true

9:02 PM yeah I am use to using YIM first time I have used google chat actually

9:03 PM so whats new with hypnosis?

9:04 PM me: Not much today

except 2 people added me on talk at exactly th same time

9:05 PM deki889: geez

the price of popularity

9:06 PM me: Hehe ^.^ I'm not popular, just weird

Everybode wants to stair

9:07 PM deki889: lol, I know the feeling. As my abnormal psych proffesor said. People love to put others in a cage to say that is not me

me: Thats neat. Your a psych student?

9:08 PM deki889: yep, have about 4 semesters left then debating on masters, Dr. program, or looking for a job

me: Good luck with that :) Wish I could

deki889: thanks, you can't go for a higher degree?

9:09 PM Then again doubt I will go further since do not have the drive like a lot of people do

me: I couldnt afford it now

9:10 PM deki889: ahh, another problem that I will have too

me: And i'm happy with my job, dont want to move again

deki889: that is what matters, if you are happy and enjoy what you are doing

9:11 PM Oh yeah if you do not mind me asking, how did you like the slob trigger i sent you?

9:12 PM me: It was a different idea, but a bit like the bimbo one

9:13 PM Or maybe not, its hard to describe

deki889: hmmm, what do you mean like bimbo? just not feeling it and not enjoying it?

me: I didn't feel any different, didn't notice at the time

9:14 PM but then afterwards, I was looking back and thinking did I really do that

deki889: what all did you do?

9:15 PM me: Just little things, throwing crisp packets at the bin when I finished and I didnt care it made a mess, and drinking white lightning

not that much different than normal

deki889: ahh okay, so basically did not make that big of diffrence

so looking for something a bit more?

9:17 PM me: On that path? I dunno

deki889: just mean over all something that you can notice the change and is a bit bigger

me: Yeah, that could be good

9:18 PM I especially like feeling like I been tricked, like someone outsmarted me and I think whtever they want because they're smarter

Or being forced to do something like I cant resist it

deki889: hmmm, makes sense

9:19 PM so any current triggers you are under?

9:20 PM me: Not that I know of

deki889: okay, there is always one fun one I did with a friend if I had a chance to talk to her on IMs or such.

9:21 PM me: What's that?

9:22 PM deki889: triggered her so that when talking on IMs, anything I type in between * * she will be able to be changed by such as body change, mind change, etc.

me: Oh thats interesting

Somethings weird

deki889: since she liked giving up control it made it where I could control her in personal online

me: Sounds kind of familiar, like I did that but i can't quite remember it

I dont remember writing anything

9:23 PM so maybe its in my head now

deki889: ahh, so you are still under a trigger

me: or its one of the bad ones that Angel let me forget

deki889: I think I know the one you are under, it is in your jounral

me: Is it?

9:24 PM deki889: yep, that is how I got your E-mail here

me: I can't read all the stuff there

I get to write everything down even the things I dont even know

deki889: wow

9:25 PM me: so i go back to read my journal and i just skip bits automatically, and even if I notice them I can't make myself read them without getting distracted until that email is finished

deki889: that makes sense

9:26 PM me: Angel's pretty cool

deki889: yeah, a safety net is always need with this stuff

9:28 PM yeah have some rather bad stories about one friend.

9:29 PM me: Somebody got hurt?

I got a few of those too

9:30 PM deki889: yeah, 3 times a guy offline found out about her hypnosis and was able to take her as a slave and basically made her leave all her normal life for him..

and sadly I am afraid she might have done it again... she disappeared again on me.

9:31 PM me: :(

9:32 PM deki889: yeah, so I will wait till she returns again and hope for the best.

me: when i first started doing this, master Andrew had one slave hes devoted to, and played a few times with anybody who wanted fun, did exactly what they wanted

good luck

9:33 PM deki889: thanks, funny thing I am not a dom. Just very curious on hypnosis

9:34 PM me: but his main slave was a real bitch and managed to learn some stuff herself, enough to take advantage of his back into trance trigger tried to turn everybody else into her fulltime slaves and leave their life so shes still got fun when hes not around

deki889: see that is crappy

9:35 PM me: When he found out he promised not to do it any more except with people who are already in the hypnosis scene, blamed himself

removed all the commands and triggers, except i asked him to leave me the email slave thing so i can play with other people ocasionally, he knows thats my own idea

and he made her feel how it feels to be used like that, so shed know and never do it again

9:36 PM deki889: glad to hear that she got what was coming to her, and making her feel the pain that she has caused others is a great way

9:37 PM me: I feel sick thinking how she used us. but theres still this little doubt in the back of my mind thinking, was it maybe me who was the bitch

if she feels used like this, would she even know she was the one who did it?

9:38 PM deki889: now question is what makes you think you where the bitch?

9:39 PM me: I dont know, but I could be right?

deki889: well were you intentions that to hurt others? Or did your actions do anything to hurt someone?

me: And I get fun out of sending the best, most twisted emails I get onto other slaves

9:40 PM deki889: sounds a bit like you might have a dom side to you then.

If you do not mind me asking, what feelings do you get out of sending the mails to others?

9:42 PM me: Its so much fun, thinking about what these people will be doing, and knowing that I'm in control

like im the pinch in the hourglass, and all these things they might love or hate are happening through me

9:43 PM deki889: nods you have a dom part to you then, that want to have control over others and make them do things.

ack seems anything between * * turns out nods here

err bold

9:44 PM if you want ever we can test out your dom side

me: *nods* yeah

Could be interesting

9:45 PM Did you see the one I sent naughtyemailslave? Only one I did myself

deki889: I did see it, very interesting

hmmm, so what dom fetishes would you like?

9:46 PM or do you feel that you have?

me: I dont really know

9:47 PM deki889: well for example, if you could do anything to me. what would you like to do?

9:48 PM me: I dont know. I dont really know you, dont know what would make you squirm

9:49 PM deki889: So you would like to see me humiliated?

me: But when I think that, I feel some guilt

9:50 PM deki889: So you are a switch, you have dom and sub things you like. I am the same but diffrent, to nice to be a dom and too stubborn to be a good sub

9:51 PM me: Sounds like some kind of irony

9:52 PM deki889: it is

I could test your dom wants the same way I tested someone's resistance

9:53 PM Triggered them through E-mail slave to act like a dom for an hour, making it so anything they type with * * happens to me and they could do anything they wanted to me.

9:54 PM Though that time was to test resistance since they are pure sub, sad part is I changed their nature for that hour.

8 minutes

10:02 PM me: Sorry, the other guy just set off my trigger, got to clean up before Flak

Oh, later than I thought, might be on later tonight then

deki889: okay

10:03 PM sounds good, will talk to you later then