lol, I think I posted the last entry right after I woke up yesterday morning - my panties were so soaked, I probably would have been better off tossing them in the trash.

The entire day was a blur. I had work at home to do (looking for permanent receptionist-kinda job), but I didn't get as much done as I should have. I had porn on the screen for a bit throughout the day (nothing fancy), and I just got out of the shower now since I'm going to bed.....I think I came & had light orgasms about four times today, my hand was absolutely soaked.....even in the shower, I started moaning when I bent over to wash and my legs almost gave out on me.

I've got a theory going....I have different stuff to do during the day now that I didn't during my holiday vacation, and I think the logical part of my mind is "powering through" most of the day for me ~simply~ because I know that messing around could wreck my livelihood for the moment.

Regardless, I know I used the files too much over the last few months at this point since I'm totally addicted to listening to them & cannot stop myself. Reading some of my older entries (OMG =_=) - I think I just randomly came again - I think back about how I used to just have a casual interest in sex and stuff, and now I'm practically bent over waving my ass in the air & asking for it more & more as time goes on.

There's the half of me that finds all of this fun & interesting & likes how it feels, and there's the other half that's freaked out (I'm 100% at the mercy of the "feeling good" too). I USED to just rub myself a little and poke at my clit a bit when the mood struck me once or twice a month - I've now gone to playing with my tits like a maniac (I practically faint if they're touched now) & can barely keep from screaming at the top of my lungs when I start to go lower. Gawd.....I ALWAYS used to be ~F.R.E.A.K.E.D. ~ O.U.T~ by the thought of anything anal, and now I SWEAR I'm hearing a voice in the back of my head that's coaxing me with "put it in" or whatever, AND that leads to more thoughts of "maaaybe, that might feel....good...." - and then I REALLY freak out & stop myself......the whole thing is both awesome & scary.

To wrap it up (soooo tired), I can already tell that I basically turn into a human fucktoy (I can feel it now even) whenever I start getting horny....it goes away a little if I pursue the feeling and attempt an orgasm, but then comes back soon after & stronger than it was. That's how I spent the whole day - feeling like if some random person burst into the room, I'd start forcing them to suck on my tits and leave me on the floor in a coma and drenched in cum from all of the pleasure.

(WHY CANT I STOP TYPING? I'M TIRED DAMMIT!) The other half of the theory I mentioned earlier is that as soon as a vacation hits again (probably Thanksgiving?) or my responsibilities disappear (boyfriend that takes care of everything?), there's nothing keeping me from going ~complete~ fucktoy on myself and just rolling on the floor naked - I'm not right now only because my family occupies the other rooms in the house. (=_=)