This started as just a comment, but I might as well go in for the full update, so here it goes:

Sorry for the lack of posting - I finally scored myself some "fun" over the last week, so I'll try to post a bit about that further down. I've been CRAZY-busy with picking up work, and though I figured it would be a good idea to update, I have not felt any driving urges to chat about my experiences lately, so the site has been the last thing on my mind.

Also, Zap - it's not like I'm against making stuff (especially if it could generate a couple of $$$), but a lot of what I DO currently have is mostly personal & based on my own specific experiences in order to force/modify my behavior. I guess it would all depend on what the circumstances would be. If I ever did do anything, I'd rather only collaborate (i.e. make suggestions) with someone that knew what they were doing, as I'm fairly blind to the technical/computer-y stuff involved in creating files from absolute scratch.

I'm SERIOUSLY reconsidering messing with anyone else's head at this point (at least, people I know personally). The more time that's been passing with all of the suggestions being under control, the more I realise how much of a mindless whore I turned into. I've actually been having flashbacks of some of my time spent in a bimbo-haze, and I borderline puke now over how much I remember throwing my panties and boobs in peoples' faces while giggling around a room like a drunk slut trapped in a porn shop. Frankly, I'm NOT shocked now that I'd had my family yelling at me about it once or twice - I'd probably have done the same thing if I saw my sister doing all that junk.

On that note, an encounter while out and preparing for the holidays wound me up with a guy over the last week. We met up a few nights ago to have some fun and see where things went, and I wound up staying out until morning. I think......this whole thing is a great example of why I never wanted to delete anything - after driving around and doing a bunch of random stuff, we ended up stopping back at his place and "fooling around" a bit. His "safety equipment" was listed as expired (which we found out in the middle of unzipping), so we wound up agreeing to avoid doing stuff that we'd regret.

Now, previous to the experimenting with hypnosis, I'd always been grossed out about placing stuff in my mouth and whatever. I had enough time to realise that certain actions were going to be off-limits that evening, and then the suggestions/programming just about immediately kicked in. I swear, the sensation is almost like this bizarre "hunger" or "thirstiness" in my throat or something - any last bit of shyness I may have ever had just up and disappeared at that point and I was sucking like a champ. I don't know whether or not to be proud of the fact that I had him exhausted, but I ultimately FORCED (lol) him to keep going. Actually, as I'm typing this, I'm realising that no amount of poking or rubbing was shutting me off.....it's actually pretty scary to think it (now that I actually go over it again in my head), but I only wound up letting him stop because we both passed out from being so tired........he missed work the next morning. >:B

Either way, it felt good, was fun.....the missing work thing was VERY bad though.....we probably won't be doing that again any time soon. I'm actually still seeing the one guy I'd met casually & mentioned ages ago, though we only get to meet up and chat over snacks once or twice a week - we're taking things veeeeeery sloooooowly. I'm not really inclined to mess that up by doing anything weird for the moment, so I'm not going to go out of my way for a 2nd night out if I don't hear any calls/texts.

And that's about it. I'm still wondering how the heck I'd have stopped myself if my sleepiness hadn't won out, but I've not felt anything like that for the last few days anyways since waking up and going home. I otherwise feel perfectly normal and 200% smart again. I'm going to get going now since it's a bit after midnight, so hopefully I'll remember to check for comments and such again if the urge to automatically do so hasn't hit me. Time for bed!