Well now it's official i have almost fully regressed to a 3 year old, i have a teddy i talk to imaginary friend i am never sad except on one specific topic, I really think i would not be here right now if it wernt for some wonderful people. I have been having lots and lots of suicidal thoughts and lots of painful thinking the fact that i somehow operate when i am not 3 is a miracle. I really am thankful, but still i really dont wanna grow up its too hard to much tough memories so many bad people in the world. I am scared to talk to someone I.e Counseling or Therapists i cant do it, i don't know what to do anymore. i know i have around 7 suicide notes hidden in my room. I constantly think is this how i wanna go out? will anyone care if i am gone? is my life worth living? I have been losing hope in my regular self. I feel so alone un loved. Even my own mothers hugs feel cold to me. But here i can be happy people are so nice to me they understand how i feel, i know its not therapy but still without people here i would not be... well here right now regressing makes me happy :) being a kitty makes me happy but the thing is right there is where it slows me down, getting accepted by people for who i am. What i like. My life here is a secret no family or friends know anything about this. I have told one friend i like hypnosis but that's where it ends. I can't bring myself out to tell someone i am scared of rejection, of being turned down. Sorry for posting this, the only safe place now to do so. If you read this please do not comment please PM me if you want to talk. I am in the chat rooms around 4:30 Mountain Time Like i said without you i would not be here. If you bothered to read this thank you :) It does mean a lot to me another side note this is not a suicide/ last note thing, this is an update. Again with my regression my emotions swing too wildly, i needed a place to relive myself. You do not know how much this means to me. :) thank you for reading hope you have a good day or night. Sorry for boring you hope you understand