today was an emotional roller coaster ride for me, i had a very emotional chat with Mistress Squirrel, i wont go into too much detail, but she gave me a chance to talk about my feeling in general, this was a draining experience, i don't talk about feeling much, it seems they just well up inside me, Mistress gave made me feel so loved and cared for that i felt the floodgates open, i honestly think i told her things i hadn't even admitted to myself, it felt good but draining to let it all out, i even cried which is a rare occurrence, she was supportive, loving, i have never felt so cared for, and she didn't judge me, she just seems to be able to read me so well, she sees beyond the proverbial mask i wear to protect myself from hurt.....i know I'm rambling now, this entry doesn't do justice to Mistress Squirrel, and i dont think i will ever have words that will, oh and then there was all the milking and cowgirl stuff, :) awesomesauce