Hmm....I'm pretty heavily under the influence of something....or someone I guess. The holiday weekend was crazy. In & out of the house.....the guys in & out of me. XD
I've really been studying up on brainwashing & mind control. I often hear a lot that guys are mostly only going for the physical part of the sex stuff. In turn, all of us women are more about the emotion/thought behind it. I know for a fact that I'm all about the emotion (at least, until the pleasure kicks in), though I realise that everyone might have an exception here & there.....it might not be 100% true for EVERYONE out there. I've been poking around & came across the subject of "pickup artists", and it's a scary thought that just talking to someone, a girl in particular, can break down their resistances and make them more likely to take their panties off. As insecure as I can be with myself sometimes, I KNOW it's happened to me once or twice, and I didn't even see it coming.
I reeeeally dont know why it fascinates me so much....my BFF is as much of a slut as I am at this point. If either of the guys want something from us, bending over & moving panties aside happens without a second thought + a smile.
Everything is so compartmentalised (yay! Firefox says I spelled it right the first time!) now. Both myself & my BFF dont really have too much trouble getting through work anymore - it's all just a blur. My brain shuts off, I be the robot that does her job & gets a paycheck, hangs out with the family....then I can put my full attention into sucking cock and being nice & obedient + smiling the whole time.
I see A LOT of people around here constantly dropping the line "blah blah, cant be hypnotised if you dont want it - just stop & it will wear off".....and while that may hold true for some of the audio files around here (noting that the quality varies from file to file), I dont exactly see that in myself. I'm totally 200% all-for having lots & lots of sex, but with the guys in the equation now fucking me & my BFF constantly, if they ever say something while I'm orgasming my brains out, it just kind of....hangs there. I cant stop thinking about it - no matter what it is.
Eeeeeeither waaaaay....I think i only got a few hours of sleep last night. I'm so strung out & slow right now.....I dont feel like I can just hop into bed & fix it. I just....seriously cant wrap my head around all of this. Mind you, I LOOOOVE constantly keeping pretty, having good posture, smiling, being perky, etc....I just know that I wasnt always this way & that I cant stop. I've been hearing "Be good girl - obey" constantly over & over in my head all morning, and I've blanked out from it a couple of times.....it's just weird to think that it was put there "artificially", and yet it feels so ~right~ that it's there. It really makes me appreciate that we really should just be nice & compliant....spread our legs & leave the heavy-lifting/thinking to the guy~