I'm on a journey, or perhaps a quest, to recover my sexy self, my libido, my creative spark. Having spent the past seven years in a seemingly endless cycle of pains medications and surgeries, my desire and feeling desirable was much diminished. No surprise there.

The surprise is how my verve, vitality and inate sexiness has been on the rise these past six months. I'm a year from my last surgery and slowly the pains have diminished and my energy returns! I truly thought it was lost for good and as I stand here looking at the far side of fifty I feared that it was not going to return. I am so happy and excited to be "waking up".

So perhaps a journal here. My journey of return and better to the sexual woman I was born to be. A place to record fantasies, desires, ideas and discoveries. Private, but public. It's going to be a very good year.