Files: Induction, CursehormoneChange, Trainslave1, TrigBodySlave

Why did I listen to it >.< Ugh... gaaah!
All the strength has been sapped out of my body... or rather... it's being redirected. After listening to several of the files... I couldn't even stand! My body was so weak that I fell to the ground immediately... but I was completely awake. I'm awake and very very relxed... comfortable... happy and content! But all my strength is gone... Or not gone... I think it's still there but it's gone elsewhere for the time being. I'm going to need to exercise this until I have the strength to handle it and my daily activities. Good HEAVEN I'm freaking awake. This feels better then a damn caffeine buzz! Good... crap... heaven... JEEX!
Hee hee! ^.^ wheee... hee hee.
I wanna move around but I still haven't gotten my legs to get back into synch. I think... I vaguely recall those going under the fastest. I... I can't remember what was in the files EXACTLY... it feels like a dream. The harder I try to remember the more it slips away from. To the point where; now that I stopped trying to write this down... I've actually forgotten even more! I remember WHY I listened to them... so I know what they should be doing to me. I think. CRAP. I've never been addicted anything in my entire life... and now I'm totally addicted to this! -.- Sigh... I wonder if I'll be able to share this with anyone... I'm sure if I told Kuro about it he wouldn't believe me. M's enjoying the sub life and I wouldn't want to force her into the dom position more then she'd like. There's others... they may be into it. Like the carpenter or EW... I feel small.
It's really weird... I feel smaller for some reason. I feel skinnier too. -.- This is very odd... At least I seem to be stuck on my near-female voice. ... ... oh... wait... I seem to tbe stuck on my near-female voice O.o D...duh... oops... Why does everything look smaller?! GAH... The whold world has gotten smaller. Although, I understand why. I've always said that I know things are smalled then they look through my glasses... so I've always believed that through clarity everything should technically be smaller then I think it is. Soooo... I can see very clearly right now. Probably because I'm so damn happy and content and relaxed.
Aaaaaaalso... being on the hormones helped with that. For... some reason. Mind over matter I guess.
Good heavens I'm hyper now. Really hyper. I dunno what to do... well... actually I do have an idea of what I wanna do... but I can't do that right now ^.^ ... maybe... I'll listen to some more files... re-do a couple to try and figure out what I can't remember. That maid one sounds particularly neat... and non-sexual. You know I just realized that being told to obey makes me particularly horney. O.o Cause I waaaaaant to... Sigh. Obey... That's the only word that sticks in my mind for some reason. It's the only word I can really hold on to that I remember from the files... hmm...
Oh... wow... I didn't realize I listened to that many of them! I can't even remember time moving that... wow! It's 5:30... I got here a little after 3! Have I really been listening to them for that long? Then in that case... why did I stop? My mind must have realized that I didn't have enough strength to go any further. I'll need to rest before I can do it again.
I can vaguely remember how the trance felt... I've felt it before. I guess this really proves that the mind, spirit and body are seperate entities... my spirit is absolutely exhausted... my mind is sharp but controlled. *Blinks and ponders what she just said*
My mind feels regulated...
That's odd.
And my body feels very relaxed and awake.
I bet this is what most people get after a good meditation. I think I'm going to do this more often ^.^ At least just to get more meditative time in... I can use this for my rituals toooo... heh heh... Usefullll... Once a day should be good. Hell... this is the ultimate once a day wake up thingy... ish... ya know? Fuck coffee... this is hot stuff.
Being in a trance felt... sort of like... my body was wrapped in a warm blanket. My legs especially... I felt like my whole world was the words being spoken to me.