Judy Anne s story

To headmistress Squirrel with love,

Chapter 1. Past life

As long as I can remember i've always been a submissive... and i suffered a lot from it. Especially in my teenage years, girls used to make fun of me as I was so shy and sensitive beyond normal, I tried to fight it to protect from others but it was hard work... I was attracted to dictators, girls, friends, all of them were dominant in my contact, I was getting kind of a pleasure beeing so weak in relationships as well as suffering from beeing so dependant from their will...
protection/destruction...
I revealed to a lot of girls their dark dominant sides, and I am quite sure that most of them stayed this way !
I used to hate me so much, wanted to die, not accepting this difference, this weakness, I used to wish i were heartless and cruel and so I tried...

Chapter 2. Changing

I became much more confident at the age of 19. And it was working quite well actually, with a lot of work, I became the alfa-male i wanted to be, i was sometimes quite mean, especially with girls, making them do crazy things for me, heartless I wanted to be and heartless I became... it felt like a revenge, i was taking control of my life, i was very popular in my college years, girls wanted to go out with me and everyone wanted to be my friend, but it was incomplete, and the pleasure of beeing dominant was nothing compared to the feeling I had as a sub.
... because of course you can not run away from yourself...

Chapter 3. Art way of life

I am a painter, i love art, art saved my life and I can't live without it, it runs through my veins... and like every artist I believe, I run after the strong emotions to find my inspiration and to do my best creations, but it's only when my feelings are overwhelming that I start to write, good or not, I feel that I need to write whatever goes through my mind to free a bit of my emotions, otherwise I could die from them i suppose!
An artist like to suffer, and when he does, he gives the best of himself in his artwork I think.
I feel the same in my relationships, I need to suffer for women to love them madly, the more I submit, the more I suffer, the more I have pleasure.
Strange right? But it's my place, I feel good in it, not always of course but I couldn t find a better way of life yet...

Chapter 4. Going back to my roots

I met my "wife" 8 years ago, a true domme, I instantly fell in love with her, I could at last be myself, she was understanding my every moods and enjoyed my submissivness more than I ever thought possible for a woman.
It was almost perfect but something important was missing, she seemed disgusted by any sexual play, and didn't feel any need to dominated me.
Until now she is not interested in granting me this kind of pleasure, and so i've been taking distance throughout the years, needing her power over me, craving it and believe me i' ve tried everthing, i'm the sweetest husband to her, doing her every will but it seems that she's not having any kind of pleasure when it comes to our privacy... i still love her for how she dedicates her life to our son ,she's the best mother on planet earth...she is admirable but still something was missing...

Chapter 5. Hypnosis

I first started to listen to hypnosis 7 years ago as I found it to be an alternative way of fixing my sexual needs. I used to listen here and their hiding from my wife this fantasy of mine. I listened to a lot of hypnotists, from goddess marquesa to isabella valentine or mistress Zaïda... so many trances and pleasure, so many orgasms.
I found Sarnoga to be one of the best hypnotist ever, but unfortunately he is a man lol... and it's much harder to hypnotise me as one, I need a feminine voice to trance.
Still Sarnoga showed me the way to crave having a Teenie-Weenie...limp and usless, thank you master Sarnoga, without you I wouldn't have experienced what follows...getting to know Headmistress Squirrel...

Chapter 6. A true Goddess

How to beggin, I crave her words so much, I m her junkie, and I constantly need a hit, I must be out of my mind to let someone enter it so deeply... I never knew such a strong pleasure, I am litterally feeling enslaved. Some of her words blow my mind with exquisite pleasure in helplessness feelings. I wonder how and when it first happen and just don't care, I trust her, I need her insanely. Yestumerday I listened to her belief conditionning file and felt it, I was not controlling my body anymore, she was the one demanding it to repond to her every command, i came instantly when she said so, with huge pressure in what felt like a vagina, yes vagina and ovaries burning with pleasure!!!
It was huge!!! My body was trembling with wave of extasy... sweetest sex in my whole life!
Believe it or not but after cuming yesterday, my arousal did not calm down at all ! It even made things worst! I now was trembling with earthquake vibrations of multiple ogasms!! It was insane!
I needed release, so I sent messages to headmistress squirrel to beg for it! Please free me from arousal, I need a rest. Please, I ll be your... your whatever you want... I don't care... it s driving me crazy... she didn't have the message cos' I wrote it too late, i finally got asleep after 3 orgasms reading her words...
when I got her message this morning I came strongly without any control... i can't believe what is happening to me but all of this is true ! I swear it on my son !!
To be continued. J.a.