Muscle Hypnosis Forever
I'd been hypnotized before, but only in person and only therapeutically. It was a last ditch attempt to deal with some nagging issues and to my shock, it worked. At $90 a session, it was a big risk, but it paid off. I'd had some behaviors that I learned were meeting a certain need. I couldn't change those behaviors until I understood, on the deepest level, that I could meet the same justifiable need but in a better way. So I was flying high from that, and remembered thinking throughout the sessions how much I enjoyed the focused, centered, slow steady feeling of being under. I'd been vaguely frustrated that my hypnotist wasn't quite my type, though I didn't understand why that would matter.
I stumbled on, or okay I admit sought out, some online groups and sites which pushed the sexual potential of hypnosis. Was this what I wanted all along? I realized that's why I'd gone to that hypnotist in the first place and that solving those ongoing issues was at most a side benefit. My need still remained.
So I started out with some mp3s and experienced some deep effects and focus. Yet I sought to go deeper still. I needed another person. I needed more.
Putting out a call for a hypnotist online was easy. I knew I wasn't ready to seek out the full experience in person so online made sense. What wasn't easy was finding someone to meet needs that I myself was still conflicted about. I'm sure to these men I appeared flaky and insincere. Hot and cold. I fantasized deeply about mind control, yet always read that hypnosis can't make me do anything I don't already want to do. It can't make me do something in violation of my values.
But what I discovered, to both my horror and arousal, was that hypnosis can make me confused about what my values are in that moment. It can make me believe that doing something is within my values and beliefs even though it, in fact, is not.
There is a certain online hypnotist I came across who sought to build my body up. He sought, innocently enough it seemed, to help me focus on weightlifting goals. Although I hadn't cammed before, as it was non-sexual and his focus was on helping me, I took a chance and turned my cam on. Of course it made sense that he would need to see my chest and legs, arms and back. And for my own safety during hypnosis that he would need to watch me.
This extended to watching me listen to personalized mp3s he made for me. Sitting at my computer with my cam on and headphones on and mind in a sense turned off created an intense focus that I could feel physically, as if a thick cloth covered me inside and out. I was quieted, calmed and (hidden to him) aroused by this man. My desire to be a good subject in some ways made the hypnosis more powerful. At times I wondered if I was playing a role as a good subject or if it was genuine. But then those thoughts disappeared.
I remember spending what was likely an hour counting down from 1000. I was to picture each number on a chalkboard, then erase it, and each time I did I was erasing intelligence. I admitted to him I was conflicted, feared being exploited, feared the experience. He helped me understand, in the moment, that letting the hypnosis take effect was a way to eliminate the conflict, that it was so easy to focus on his voice, let all conflict fade away. He told me that whenever I experienced any rush of fear or doubt, any sensation of a warning bell or internal voice telling me to be careful, that it was like clenching my muscles then relaxing. It would be so difficult to maintain that intense fear and doubt and be so much easier to relax. In this way, my own internal warning system became yet another hypnosis device for him.
After I had counted down, and I don't know if he really watched or listened the whole time since it was one way cam, he did ask me for my full name and birthday. I felt that rush of fear. Revealing personal information online was insane. Yet then I thought, through the haze, that I was thankful for him to present me the opportunity to go deeper into it, to experience the power of hypnosis. And when I did a gut check, I realized that I wanted to do what he said. So I told him my information and immediately got an erection.
He'd sent me pics of himself and at the moment I said my name he turned the cam on. He was him. He was his pictures. Just a handsome man in his early 30s with a calm disposition. After that moment, he became more available to me. Online more. Asking me when I would be online. It wasn't a treasure hunt for his time anymore. He gave me the reward of his time.
He became even more interested in my physical development. It was completely natural to me to go down to underwear so he could see my glute development. He had me pull and poke and prod my body so he could make very specific comments on needed improvements. My 16% body fat was to get down to 10%. And during that my overall weight was to raise by 10 pounds. I drank protein drinks on cam in my underwear until I felt so bloated I thought I'd be sick. Then I'd have to do hundreds of pushups and crunches while he watched. Then more protein.
He recorded more personalized mp3s for me and had me listen to them on repeat all night, keeping my cam on pointing at my bed. I would try to recall what was in the mp3s. What I can remember is that they are about 30 minutes long each and the last 20 minutes of each seems to be blank. I just remember the inductions. In the back of my mind, I think he's talking through the whole 30, but that last 20 I just have no ability to recall. I could skip ahead and just listen to them without the induction but I know he could tell if I did that and I don't want to cross him.
I admit that lately, I've been nude while on cam with him, while he remains fully dressed. He's been doing experiments with me regarding testosterone levels, seeing how ejaculation timing and frequency impacts muscle development. I appreciate how much time he takes for me. There are also times I sit down on a dildo repeatedly up and down while counting down numbers off the chalkboard of my stupid brain. It's a pleasure for my IQ to drop, such a release. And doing squats on the dildo helps my muscular development.
I also appreciate his rates. I understand that what he offered in the beginning were free samples. He has important things he needs to buy like clothes and dvds and sneakers and electronics. At first he had me buy things for me like a better headset and microphone so he could help me with his voice in my head, then the right jockstraps and sneakers and shorts so my workouts would be better, then he sent me a link for a paypal button so I could pay him for his time. I was so glad I'd told him my real name before that so he could see that that paypal name matched up to that. I liked taking out my credit card on cam. It made me hard.
And yes I masturbated my cock and nipples and anus openly for him. It helped him see my muscles in motion. I now leave my cam open for him at all times and connect by voice when he is wanting that. He knows so much about me, and that helps me help me so much. If I hadn't revealed so much, he wouldn't have been able to take me where I need to go. I'm so glad I met him and not someone who would exploit me in some way. That would be terrible. Next up I'm buying a plane ticket to see him. I can't wait.