Chapter 3

Charless and the Little One and Mother Nature...CH3

by Casey @ warp my mind

8/22/2020 all rights reserved.

Charless: imitates Mother Nature.. 

"Yoooo hooo!.."

Mother Nature: Beeza! Bug offf pesky human! ..

Charless: Nature.. We need to talk...

Mother Nature: Twirls hair and walks away.. Nope... I don't talk with humans... no more... they don't listen...

Charless: Nature if you don't get yer ass back here I will cut this tree burn it and eat it! ..

Mother Nature: Stops okay.. So you sound like a bug.. What do you want Mr. Bug?

Charless: Why is the RoadMaster targetting to sacrifice you so hard?

Mother Nature: I don't know.. Maybe he thinks I threw the oak branch and couple of nuts at them through the window the day they sacrificed...

That was not me.. That was a thunderbeing that did that.... 

They were stupid enough to be sitting on top of the sacred ground that we used to meet Native Spirits at, before their relative built a house on top of it....

At both locations...

They are the ones that demand the community to stop calling him crazy and delusional as they really do work with him.  This land and area has powerful Spirits, and they seem to think cutting trees and binding it in cement will make the Spirits go away.

They will not. They will only have more fun over time. 

You can not cut down the Elohim, Seraphim, Djinns, Elementals, Fairies..

It is best to keep them happy, or they will mess with things, and electronics is an easy item to mess with. And with todays world becoming more and more dependent on electronics it is really not the time to keep upsetting Nature Elementals. 

If I had my way.. We would all still be spending most of our time in the woods and marsh building stone circles chanting praying and interacting with the Spirits and wildlife...

It makes us sick we spent so much time at this machine doing work constantly...

To earn money to buy the woods, the home, support self and cats, and even help family, friends, and community... 

Why can't We be more selfish! and Stop helping others so damn much! 

Fucking Bitches keep screwing us over and over...

Charless: Relax Nature.. Just reeeelaaaaaax... We all know there is hidden good things coming, but I too worry about his over giving nature... 

Slave: oh Charless I did not see you there.. I was just day dreaming....

You come to bug Nature too?

Charless: No, I am trying to find out why Mother Nature is being targetted with The Exist to Suffer programming and Sacrifices.. 

This is not part of Mother Nature's program.... 

I understood they did good at throwing the line back at Curator.. about, 

"If you loved the woods so much? Then why did you sell it? "... 

Charless: Tell me about the Knight in Shining Armor Slave..

Slave: lol.. Spirits been picking on me since 2002...2003.. After they told me The Old Woods would be sold and cut down... I would feel very lost, dissociated and depressed.. but to pay attention to the Knight in the Shining Armor.. and that I could talk to him... And even share Sacred items with him.

The Kept on Saying, 

"Your life will start to change in your favor when your knight in Shining Armor, that lives down the road from you.. 

Arrives on a big metal crane, that works for the railroad... 

He and many others will band together to play a key roll in getting you the real help and support that you need, and your handler too.."

.. Then they started to pick on me later saying I would marry someone that lived on the same road or block I live on.. They did not live there yet but it is someone I went to school with.. That part has to be a joke as I am not interested in marriage or dating.. I just want friends... and a community.. I just want somewhere I can belong other than with Spirits.. I feel like I lost this when my Rail Group members mostly died in Iraq and Afghanistan....Serving for the US.....

One thing we believed in. There was no greater gift in life then to protect a life, laying your life down for a friend sacrificing... They all sacrificed themselves to protect fellow soldiers, batallions and civilians..

They joined the War to fight so others did not have to.. 

They wanted to prevent a draft from occuring as well... As our local community was ripping on our rails group and treating us all like criminals at the time.. 

It was not so hard to see why my group jumped into this.. 

As they wanted to serve with honor. I admit I would have joined too but I already had PTSD, DID, and SAD depression.. and they knew I would most likely get into trouble as head strong and stubborn as I am.. I do not "Conform" Well...

Charless: Hmm.. After these dreams and visions... This is around the time you started to act strange without meaning to making friends with as many railroaders as you could, and seeking out hypnosis programming handlers...

Slave: Yeah my behavior got real odd.. I am not used to fear and started to see I was heading for some serious trouble.. I did not want to go through this all.. I just wanted to jump to the good parts..

But, I also found out I was being drugged without knowing it and not eating enough food on a regular basis..and not by choice.. and if I am not eating it is because of my depression.. I do love to eat when not around people driving me up the wall...

I ended up down to 130 lbs and one doctor ripped me to never go under 180 at the time. 

I was confused as I thought all the FBI weight and height sites said 130 lbs for  5 foot 2 .. and you all know I was interested in being as physically fit as those guys were...

But, between my big ass boobs, and then found out I have a double set of many organs in my abdomen is part of it too.. 

So all my life I was led to believe my gut was fat.. when it just is full of extra organs... 

Charless: The doctor said they did not even know what all is there...But it definately is organs and muscles and not fat...

Slave: I still don't understand why the Hell Spirit threw all this woman shit at me.. and lately I have to much damn woman coming out in my personality and I hate it I do not mind joking about it from time to time..  or mind singing with that side.. 

or.. when people I do not know see me as woman, I talk all woman to try not to scare them as my apperance and mannerisms not matching my physical apperance..

But, I do not see myself as Damn Woman.. and it drives me nuts... 

I always saw myself as a man and or gender neutral...  

But no, our stupid shit USA still takes they sweet old fucking time and not recognizing us Gender X intersex people... If a Gender X wants to be seen as male or female let them on their legal stuff. but I fucking HATE being seen as FEMALE! 

... That forced me to act female shit also started to really damage my Mother Nature alt as well.. 

Mother Nature originally saw herself as an adrogynous Goddess.. Originally.. She did not claim or want a gender attached her.. But, everyone kept insisting 

Mother Nature is ALL woman and all female...

Originally Mother Nature was an slightly older outlet to my childhood Feral Child personality..  Allowing myself to be the real uncensored nature loving me...

But people kept demanding she do this or that or they would ignore her and not listen, as they would not accept her as Mother Nature.. 

Charless: So once again the major trauma with Mother Nature was not necessarily the fights, and physical issues as you could take down everyone that came at you no matter their size. 

It was the trauma of them forcing you to change your image to be what they wanted you to be.. and not as you are.. This is when Nature went from a good personality to becoming bitchy...

Controller: Most of The Real Mother Nature personality did was performing, Singing, and Shamanizing... And encouraging people to come together. These same abilities served well as they ran the Rails group..

Another key figure in the Rails group is all the alts were freely allowed to interact and express around most members of the group...Not all of course... 

Charless: My twisted jokes and humors and stories kept getting us into trouble until the whole student body was doing it then they knew it would not stop laughs...

Controller: That is what helped keep your head and theirs above the swamp of depression that whole school forced you into.

Charless: Mother Nature started to get bad over peer pressure...

Slave: That is why she started to do the stereotypes of wearing pink, and make up and etc.. cause people refused to listen to her unless she did this shit... WE HATE WEARING PINK! The only make up we like is ceremonial or spiritual or performance related... She wanted to wear light Greens...It meant growth and love and made her feel like she was around the trees she was used too, and loving people....

Charless: Hands you are toy voodoo doll...

Slave: Farts all over it...

Charless: Who did you fart on? .. 

Slave: I dunno all the mofos that keep giving me stinky shit and will not let me succeed.

Charless: Just a fart come on you can do better than that...

Slave: Hands it back nah the torture is your area..

Mother Nature: grabs the toy.. ties it to an ant hill poors honey on it...

Charless: Laughs.. There you go nature.. It was always funny when people asked you.. if you could punish them.. And they had asked.. how would you do it and you said that... There eyes get wide open... or in chat you used to pretend to throw lightning at them... 

Mother Nature: Humans are silly ant hills are fun they tickle.. the tiny itty bitty ants..  only humans seem to get sick from them... 

Humans don't know how to have fun anymore, appreciate the good and simple things...

Charless: like the smooth and sticky things..

Slave: no.. yuck..

Mother Nature: Mud puddles are fun to squish in..

Slave: Depends on how clean the mud puddle is...

Charless: Lets go squish in puddle...

Slave: no thanks...

Charless: We need to cheer Nature up...

Charless: on Track, waves proceed signal with his arm....

Slave: Follows...

Charless: leads them out the back door.. Shoes off.. Nevermind your always barefoot anyhow.. Do you hate shoes? oh right the swelling in your right foot...

Charless: stand in the puddle...

Slave: Roger..

Charless: Hmm... Grabs a boom box.. plays splish splash ...

Slave: Laughs,, 

Charless: There you go just dance.. and squish yes you can do your trains wheels and waves as you squish..

Since your internet keeps going down .. this is a good time.. to stretch and exercise your legs more...  and back build your walking and standing strength back up.. You will need it.. 

Slave: Why do you all act like things are going to change soon...

Charless: They are changing for you Nature Knows, Jones knows.. I am not sure why it is not sinking in...on all levels...

Charless: Jones.. Is there a movie coming?

Jones::nods Yes::

Charless: What is this about going down a road stuck at a railroad crossing?

Mother Nature: Laughs.. and says, "When the internet is down and they were waiting for it to connect Jones's train goes down a railroad track on the center of a road, with a railroad crossing, and annoying humans not moving off the road and tracks for a train..."

Charless: Hmm I wonder why it is manifesting in this way...

Charless: road journey, Train .. Train of thought.. Tracks work.. Car and people debris getting in the way stopping work... It makes sense with how you all think... 

Charless: it is rains and flooding taking your net out not all these people..  I think he thinks people are taking his net out as his PTSD from when Booger used to unhook the phone lines at his Grandpas old place on him so he could not call his landlords, or the police when very bad things were going down... This also explains why he gets so anxious and swears so much when the net and phone keeps going down. He fears his community is cutting him off on purpose..

Slave: I think that is it...

Charless: You do have anxiety files you made.. Find them.. and in the meantime dig out your music collection and sing.. times go faster sing as you resume putting your room back in order.. and get some of those other books you wrote you want to published organized..

Charless: Take a break from writing hypnosis files other than your 382 programming one.. get this done.. You would not believe how many people would want this program to run on them...It would not hurt to make a programs and writings to train your handlers and teams as well as theirs... And your Rails..  Write up about your Rails group codes, and tactics.. Your rails group is really needed to step into power and influence the community, especially with them cutting police forces left and right. You know how dangerous and scary this is going to get if something does not keep people in line.. Your group had a way of keeping people on track.

Slave: That was a different time and environment and group of people... This is year 2020 this it not 1993 or 1996...or 1999 and in between..

Charless: You are so blind to your positive influences but it is not your fault.. You are stuck in your room at a computer all the time.. And can only see what comes up on your facebook when you are not busy working or studying. You put in more work hours than anyone we know of..  Even when playing in chat, or singing you are STILL working...

Charless: I think he is trying to touch on the program is needing to be violated element by going at Mother Nature... Messing up the FRA Act, and this Mother Nature thing is not the best for you... It also might be his way of trying to prove even your Mother Nature alt now in your adult years is no longer the hot headed, slap happy, threat she was once made to be... Mother Nature is basically part of your inner child.. Your Feral Child... in socialized versions.. and Your Little One.. Little inner Shaman first learning to interact and Shamanize and teach the humans at a young age...

Charless: Other than slapping away people throwing punches at you.. when is the last time you violently slapped, punch, or hit someone?..

Slave: Middle School.. When I was playing basketball with a friend she got mad started to claw at the ball then started to slap me.. I blocked her slaps and she attacked me.. so I put her in a choke hold a lose one told her to relax as we had our hands in each others hairs on the count of three we both let go step away and take a break then if she wanted to continue to play basketball.. others not knowing what happened ran and got her cousin she thought I attacked her and came at me a half inch from my face swinging her fist at me face and nose threatening to hit me.. So I slapped her face and shoved her backwards and then announced this is over..  and it was just basketball gone bad.. nothing happened.. and she went and talked to her cousin found out that is what happened and everyone mad up stories about how bad this fight was joking with each other not understanding people would believe it.. Both me and her got suspended... and then the principle kept trying to make me out to be a bad leader and example and would not stop harassing me for the next three years about how "slapping is not self defense"... As they totally blew it out of purportion by the next day all three of us were talking and things were fine and her cousin got to know me and we all played pig basketball together.. I hated basketball but they all loved it and insisted I played and challenged them so I did...

Charless: Did the principle stop his harassing you?

Slave: when going into 8th grade he brought it up again.. And the Girl that did to me said she knows what he was talking about.. and she did the same thing to him got into his face the same way.. and he slapped her away in the same manner.. And she turned to the class. That is exactly what she did.. She said more lines to it.. She yelled to him now you should suspend yourself like you did to her... and the other girl said the other thing was we were wrestling over a basketball and then it got out of control... 

As another one said.. They all have PTSD..  and the topic was dropped...

So that is the last time I slapped someone acrossed the face.. Before then was in 3rd to 5th grade the same reason fending off attacks...

Charless: I see.. but people want to make it out that you get mad and rush them...

Slave: I have gotten mad and rush people with a pretend slap at times... that usually ends in a nose touch a gentle forhead flick and a silly noise that leaves them laughing smiling beat red.. but I rarely do that even.. Personal Space is important to protect.. As others like me may have PTSD over being touched... or can feel anxious or overwhelmed...

I am usually all noise but when the swearing starts that is a clear warning I am serious as hell... and it is not a game at that point.. As I did replace the smacking behavior in gradeschool with a flip of the middle finger.. swearing or a hand a talk to the hand waving motion... and usually walk off if I walk off wait a few moments to let me cool down then I will return or you can approach me...

Charless: What is this people think you are smoking?

Slave: Laughs I guess my teeth were yellow from eating Chocolate donuts full of custard.. it annoys me my two front teeth tend to collect everything.. even after i brush and wipe and teeth and rinse my throat and mouth ... minutes later items are cached on them all over again.. it is frustrating..  part of it is my dry mouth.. and my dry eyes does not help then they look red then you add my natural trancing in and out.. Then not only do they think I am smoking but they think I am into Pot or Marijuana I am not.. I had people in my teenage years lace clove ciggies and other marboro reds I experimented a little with smoking.. but I never smoked that much or often.. unless I did my prayer pipe.. but that is only six puffs exhaled with a prayer... not much of a smoke really and I stopped doing that even,.. I was diagnosed with asthma from scar tissue in my lungs from electrical burns in my lungs.. So, I do not want to irritate that.. I even stopped burning my incense that is as close to smoking I got is filling my room with incense smoke until the family banned my healing Tibetan Incense cause I stunk the house up so bad.. They did not like it smelling like a Buddhist Temple.. I thought it was awesome lol...

Charless: From what I understand you and all your alts are against smoking if not in sacred prayer...

Mother Nature: Smoking is never good...

Jones: Smoking is the most disgusting thing I have witness anyone ever do...

Slave: In my Native Heritage smoking was only allowed in a prayer offering to Spirits of our ancestors, Nature Spirits, and Spirit Universal...

I used to burn catnip, Sage, and cedar in smudging for them.. So people all would pick on me about smoking catnip.. and some people thought it was code for pot, or marijuanna ...  I think I smoked catnip maybe four times in my whole life.. I used to chew it mostly for anxiety and teeth pain.. I always had gingivitus so I would chew catnip leaves to ease that.. and it would go away.. But. I had not done that for years either.. as it reacts with onions and I love to eat my onions... and onions plus catnip = puke like hell... no thanks..

People keep bugging me about getting High I get high on my hypnosis and shamanic trancing without the use of plant helpers or enthnogens.. Many misunderstand and think Shamans sit around smoking or using drugs to get high all the time.. This is not the case, some traditions and cultures has special journeys and rituals they used these plant helpers in to aid them for a purpose.. I can reach the plant helpers without use of the drugs or enthnogens.. and many also used this to train them house to trance.. I naturally could trance in and out all my life, so I did not have to go through such training...  

I learned to journey through percussive sounds and instruments, heart beats, drum, bass, train wheels on rails... clapping, chanting, Dances..

So many ways to achieve trance for me so I have no need for "drug induced highs"...

It is frustrating as a Shamanic practioner to try to explain this to others wanting to be one, or people thinking they are doing things spiritually when they are not...  They are doing it recreationally...and causing issues with the real practioners who do use it spiritually...

Also.. Canabis, and Pot are not of my religion or tradition.. I am not a Rastafenarian.. I have no issues with those who are.. But, this is not my way, not my path, and not my choice...

I walk my path and way my way and they theirs....

Charless: Good...Your railroad track path...

Slave: Yes.. rail... Way.. smiles..

Charless: it seems one issue you are all happen is people who do not know and understand you, are always trying to understand, anaylise, and catagorize you and if something does not fit about you into their category.. they attempt to pressure and change you.. As they can not accept you multicultural ways, and your alters as they are...

Slave: Yes..

Mother Nature: Stupid Humans... Yes..

Jones: That is correct.

Charless: Glad you see you been enjoying Radio again.. WOLX is a good station for you all it plays songs you each take turns enjoying.. 

Slave: I think RoadMaster and a Lineman may have tipped the station off on adding some sound effects that make us all feel really good at times...

Charless: Good.. as you need to allow those emotions to flow at times good and bad.. Music has always been your best release according to your notes...

Your job is to keep singing and dancing, work on your writing and find a way to display it and rest your sore eyes...

Charless: Jones back to running the Train and Nature back to the Woods...

Jones: Nods.. walks off.. 

Mother Nature: Tootaloo Stinky stews! .. cackles like a witch.. runs to the woods...

Charless: Huh?

Slave: She always does that.. to everyone..

Charless: oh good...

Charless: You are Dismissed..

Slave: Roger.. Nods.. Rail hand sign salutes..

Charless: And... You do not have to do the arm one with all but for me you must...

Charless: Signs love and threws arms up .. in Love and respect gesture...

Charless: Good Train...  roll it...

Littleone: takes off singing and dancing...