Sometimes I Wonder

Sometimes I wonder how I even got into this business. Sometimes I wonder how it came to this. As he brings me to orgasm over and over again with just his voice, I wonder how it came to this stage. We started as just friends… but that’s how everyone starts isn’t it? Feelings evolve and love forms. But sometimes that doesn’t happen. Some people are left feeling empty and hateful and of course bitter. I guess I am one of those people.

“Carolina” his voice caresses me but I cannot look at him. His calloused hand appears on my shoulder and I shrug it off. “Don’t” My voice is rough from disuse and he sighs.
His mouth kisses down my shoulder and I gasp lightly before turning away. “No” I breathe again, my voice slightly stronger. He’s behind me now and I can feel him sliding a finger down my spine. “Please don’t be angry with me, mi amour” he’s pleading with me now. God, how I hate when he pleads. The sound of his voice always makes me vulnerable. Not to mention, the sound of his sexy accent makes me wet.

I shift, trying not to let my juices leak before I answer him. “I’m not” my voice is quiet. He sighs again and lays the hand that had been stroking down my spine on my shoulder. This time I do not shrug it off but turn to face him. Miguel’s handsome face is sad as he gazes at me and my eyes slowly run down his naked body. How things can change so quickly. One minute I am orgasming repeatedly, the next I am bought back to consciousness. It’s funny how things can change.

I never agreed to this. There had never been anything kinky in our relationship. It had always been passionate, missionary-style sex so when I agreed to let this happen- what the hell had I been thinking? I shouldn’t have agreed but I had and I hated myself all the more for it. I could never hate Miguel. Never. He was so sweet and passionate… and just so Spanish. I guess that was what had swept me off my feet in the first place. His… himness. Yes, that is the word I can use to describe him. His Himness.

Miguel was also the love of my life- that I was certain of and if I had anyone to be angry with it would be me.

The experience had been lovely. He had taken me under slowly and then had made me so aroused, I think I nearly stopped breathing. Then he had made love to me… once, twice, three times before finally bringing me to orgasm with his voice. I was just so damned tired but I couldn’t stop thinking that we shouldn’t have done it. But then I realized something. It had been fun. I had felt sexy and Miguel had unbelievable stamina.

I sighed and ran my hand down his chest and moving my hand to rest over his heart. “I am not angry with you, cher” I replied, kissing him gently. “I am merely reconsidering the experience”. The grin that light up his face was breathtaking and I couldn’t help but grin back as he laid me down and made love to me.

Sometimes I wonder why I was even worried in the first place.