Thanks Zap - if anything's been keeping me hooked, it's probably ~your~ files. I'd still be both terrified to death/infinitely excited (sexually) if you were to make a bimbo file similar to Silvia Black's (but for girls) ~ eeheeheehee{evil laughter} (Seriously consider not listening to that....or do? O_O )

Soooo.....been busy this week, I actually have a bit of money saved in the bank again thanks to a couple 1-day gigs throughout the week (bland tech support kind of stuff). I've been using the evenings to try and isolate a lot of my suggestions down to triggers and such. So far as I can tell, I've got everything set so that stuff ~only~ kicks in when I'm turned on. It's been working great & my orgasms rock these days (I'm even amazed at myself for how long I can keep going now too). If anything, I feel refreshed from it, if not a bit powerful/proud of myself for being able to really get into it (even if it's not exactly "me" that's having the sex or playing around).

With the extra clarity & time to study all this over.....I've come to the semi-depressing conclusion that my smarts and personality have in fact been permanently effected.....either that, or stuff isn't actually as isolated as I believe it to be? I say that since I've been noticing that my general coordination has been a little off, plus the quality of my writing (even though I do it constantly) has dropped significantly. I've been going over some papers I've written - I understand them perfectly now (unlike in previous months), yet they sound like an entirely different person has written them.....I just don't ~feel~ as smart as I used to.

The current issue I'm trying to figure out is whether or not I'm getting turned on because of stuff I've loaded into my head. I ~think~ I've managed to phase out the "pink" thing (I mean gawd, pink is like EVERYWHERE), but I'm still not 100% sure on that one. Otherwise, I completely lose my mind/sanity once I actually am turned on.....it's also a little hard to "shut off" too.

.....which brings me to the side effect I noted in the title. I'm currently in the middle of a relaxing evening with the house all to myself. I managed to "have some fun" with some porn going in the background, but I got interrupted a bit before I orgasmed. Instead of "shutting off", it feels like I'm being strung out and fatigued, yet my head's still in a daze and I'm dying for a bit of cock.....but my body is saying I came close enough and it doesn't have the will to do anything more......so I feel like a bit of a "zombie" at the moment (lol, for lack of a better word). Technically I feel normal right now, but I can tell something is still weird - saying "tits" is a fair indicator too, because I cant resist the compulsion to call my tits "tits" whenever I'm my bimbo'd-up & slutty self.

Anyways, Halloween.....darn it.....I didn't think about it until now (I was just going to wish everyone happy holidays), but the temptation of a slutty costume in the coming week might throw me off a bit from all this progress......ugh....good night everyone.....